


Fall from Grace

by Lakritzwolf



Series: Stolen Lives [1]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alec goes on a crusade, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Asmodeus is truly evil, Edom Angst, M/M, Magnus is a prisoner in Edom, Minor Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-21
Updated: 2018-12-21
Packaged: 2019-08-27 02:31:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 35,863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16693747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lakritzwolf/pseuds/Lakritzwolf
Summary: Magnus comes back from Edom to save Alec and Jace, but the price for Asmodeus’ help was Magnus himself. Alec refuses to accept Magnus’ fate as his father’s prisoner for the rest of eternity, and so he sets forth on a crusade to kill a prince of hell and free the man he loves.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LaMalefix](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LaMalefix/gifts), [apathyinreverie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/apathyinreverie/gifts).



> Beautiful cover art by @beyondthehunt on [twitter](https://twitter.com/beyondthehunt) and [tumblr](http://beyondthehunt.tumblr.com/)

* * *

_“You’re gonna make it back, you hear me?”_

_“Why wouldn’t I? Look what I have waiting for me.”_

* * *

_“Father, I have never once come here to ask for anything. There must be something else I can give you.”_

_“You are my son. What else do you think I could want of you?”_

* * *

Magnus didn’t give Jace or his fight with the Owl a second glance, already falling to his knees next to Alec. The warlock’s eyes widened as he saw the arrow in his chest.

“Stay with me...” he begged, his voice soft and yet full of urgency at the same time.

A weak smile tugged at Alec’s lips, despite the agony he was in. They were pale, as pale as his face, and his eyes were clouded by pain. “Mom said you’d make a dramatic entrance,” he pressed out, the pain audible in his voice.

Magnus tried to smile as well. “Wise woman.”

Then he focused his entire attention on the arrow and the wound in Alec’s chest, so close to his heart. If he had appeared any later, Alec would have been gone. He was at death’s door already as it was.

After a deep breath Magnus closed his hand around the arrow, the other resting on Alec’s chest. He pulled the arrow out, carefully and slowly, while his magic poured into the wound to alleviate the pain and heal the damaged flesh. Alec groaned, gritting his teeth, but with Magnus’ magic taking the edge off the pain he managed not to scream.

Finally, the arrow dropped on the floor beside him and Magnus immediately cradled Alec’s head in his hands.  
“I love you,” he whispered.  
Alec frowned at him, something in Magnus’ voice, and his face, didn’t sit right with him. “Magnus...”  
“Rest,” Magnus replied in a husky whisper and ran a thumb across Alec’s cheekbone. “And forgive me.”  
Now Alec looked at him more confused than before. “What... Magnus?”

Magnus leaned forward, pressed a gentle kiss to Alec’s lips, and equally gently, settled Alec’s head back down onto the tarmac. Jace appeared at Alec’s other side now, but Magnus didn’t as much as glance at him.  
He got up, and after another last, long look full of pain, he turned away.

“Mag...” Alec felt something close to panic building in his chest. “Magnus?”

Magnus didn’t reply, and hunching his shoulders he vanished with a few quick steps into the shadows.

“Magnus!” Alec tried to sit up, and Jace helped him by slinging his arms around Alec’s shoulders. But Alec could hardly sit upright even with Jace’s support; there was no way he could stand, let alone walk. Jace took the hint and he was on his feet in an instant, sprinting after Magnus as fast as he could. But just a few moments later he returned empty-handed, shaking his head.

Alec, too, shook his head in numb confusion.  
He exchanged a look with Jace, who could only shrug, looking as confused as Alec felt. His heart was hammering almost painfully in his chest. His head wasn’t entirely clear yet, still muddled by the agony he had been in moments ago, and Magnus’ last words ghosted through his head. He was scared, more scared than he had been even with that arrow still in his chest, even as he had been close to dying.

This was wrong. Magnus wouldn’t just leave him lying here after having just saved him from certain death. He would stay, take Alec’s hand, make sure he was all right… not just run away after a muttered apology.

When Maryse appeared moments later Jace left them to find Clary, and Alec leaned against his mother.

“Where is Magnus?” She asked him, looking searchingly into his eyes.  
“I... I don’t know,” Alec replied, shaking his head. “He just appeared, he... he saved Jace, and then me, and then he...” He shook his head again. “He said he loved me, and asked me to forgive him, and then he vanished.” It still felt surreal.  
“Vanished?” Maryse looked around, but of course there was no sign of Magnus anywhere. “Why would he do that?”  
“I don’t know,” Alec said again in a small voice. “Something’s wrong, Mom. Something’s really wrong...”  
Maryse took a deep breath. “I know... He wouldn’t just leave you here otherwise.”

Alec stared straight ahead, scared and confused because something was wrong with Magnus, really, really wrong. His lips slightly parted he kept shaking his head ever so slightly. It didn’t make sense. It just didn’t make sense, and he was more worried and afraid now than he had been the moment that Magnus had sent himself to Edom. Closing his eyes, Alec could still hear Magnus’ scream as the pentagram’s fire had consumed him, and he quickly opened them again.

“I gotta find him,” he said then and groped around in various pockets for his stele.  
“Alec,” his mother said sternly. “You just-”  
“I don’t care. I’ll live. I gotta find Magnus.”

And he wasn’t going to be stopped, not by anyone. Not by Jace, or his mother, not by Lilith, not by the Angel himself. He activated his strength and stamina rune and managed to get to his feet, but had to lean against the nearest wall for support for a moment. Maryse was at his side in an instant, but he gently pushed her away.

“I gotta find Magnus.”

Though in truth he had no idea where to even start looking. Magnus had simply vanished into the darkness, one of the side alleys between the buildings, and at this point Alec had nothing with which he could track him. So he did the next best thing he could think of: he headed for the loft. Because even if Magnus wasn’t there himself, there were lots of things there Alec could use to track him.

Alec had to activate his stamina rune twice more on his way to the loft, and he was staggering with exhaustion by the time he made it up the stairs. But the lights were on, and that meant Magnus was home, and Alec wasn’t going to let him slip away again without an explanation this time.

“Magnus?” He all but stumbled through the door. The wards were down, but Alec didn’t know if he should worry about that or not.

Silence was all that answered him.

“Magnus!”

Alec stopped shortly before he reached the balcony doors and looked around.

“Magnus!”

And then he heard a few slow, hesitant steps behind him and spun around, to look at Magnus who was standing there, with slumped shoulders and downcast eyes.

“Magnus, what...” Alec hurried towards him, but Magnus lifted his hand and took a step back to stop Alec from embracing him. Alec stared at him for another moment, his lips pressed together, his hands hovering helplessly in the air. “Magnus, talk to me!”

Magnus sighed and dropped his head even further.

Something was off. No, something was decidedly wrong about him, but Alec couldn’t quite put his finger on what it was.

Then, Magnus shook his head, his face strangely blank.

“What?” Alec swallowed. “Can’t you talk anymore?” But when he took a step forward, Magnus took a step back. “Magnus, please...”

He didn’t know what was going on, but it was more than clear that Magnus neither wanted to talk to Alec nor did he want to be touched by him. He felt an ache build in his chest and a cold knot was forming in his stomach.

Finally, Magnus sighed, a sound heavy with defeat, and headed for his study. Alec followed hesitantly and watched as Magnus picked up a pen and a notebook, quickly writing a few sentences before handing Alec the notebook without really looking at him.

_I’m sorry. I didn’t want you to see me like this. I wanted to leave you a proper letter of farewell._

“Farewell?” Alec’s head flew up, his eyes growing wide. “What? What are you talking about?”

Magnus didn’t meet his eyes.

Alec shook his head with parted lips, but looked down at the writing again after a moment.

_I needed my father’s magic, and I had no choice but to pay the price. I have to go back to Edom to him. I won’t be coming back._

A choked breath escaped Alec’s throat and he looked up again. “Magnus... you can’t... you can’t do that...”

Magnus held out his hand, and Alec reluctantly handed him the notebook back.

_I have no choice_ , Magnus wrote, and hesitated, the pen hovering above the paper. It was only then that Alec noticed that Magnus’ hands – which were usually so graceful and steady, their movements sinuous and fluent – were trembling, the pen hanging askew between them.

It took Magnus a long moment before he continued writing, and the letters were wobbly and far from running in a straight line.

_There was nothing I could offer him as payment but me. And he bespelled and cursed me so I wouldn’t have a choice. I can’t stay. Every minute here causes me pain._

“Magnus...” Alec reached out, but Magnus jumped away from the touch.

He stared at Alec for what felt like an endless moment before he swallowed and took a shaky breath.

“He took everything from me,” he rasped, and Alec flinched at the sound of his voice. It wasn’t Magnus’ smooth and beautiful voice, it was hoarse and rough, it was nothing like the voice Alec knew.  
“Magnus,” Alec whispered, horrified.  
“He took everything that was human,” Magnus went on. “What you see is a glamour, and a weak one. I don’t have much strength to keep it in place. I have to fight the pain of staying here with every single heartbeat.”

Alec shook his head, his throat too dry to swallow. “Magnus...” as if he was incapable of saying another word, of even thinking of another word.

“My father wanted me to live at his side, rule at his side, and he made sure that I have no choice but to do just that,” Magnus went on. “He stripped me of my humanity and turned me into the true demon spawn that I am.”  
“But Magnus!” Alec buried his hands in his hair. “You’re not a demon! You don’t... You are not a demon! You… you’re not…”  
“Alexander...” Despite the distorted voice, his anguish was audible. “I would drop this glamour to convince you, but I don’t want you to see what I have become. I want you to remember me as I was. And if I had known you would have the strength to come after me, I wouldn’t have come back here.”  
“Magnus... no. This can’t be...Tell me it’s not true,” Alec said and took another step forward, only for Magnus to take a step back. “It’s not true!”

“Alexander,” Magnus said again. “I only came back to finish the last touches to the wards here. I wanted to give you this...” He broke off and shook his head. “Come with me.”

Alec shook his head, his thoughts a mess of fear and denial and confusion, but he followed Magnus nonetheless. Now that he knew what was wrong it was obvious what had bothered him about Magnus’ appearance before. He looked like a badly animated character. His face hardly changed as he spoke and showed no emotions.

“Here,” Magnus said and pointed at a small, round silver disc set into the wall close to the door. “All this needs is a few drops of your blood, and then you can activate or deactivate the wards with your stele, even when I’m not around anymore.”

Alec swallowed drily, and Magnus turned around. “I wanted to give this to you... I made a mistake, back then. When I didn’t want you to move in with me? I should have listened to my heart. Life is so short, and time is so precious... but it’s too late now.”  
“Magnus, stop.” Alec lifted his hands. “Please stop. You’re not making any sense.”  
“I should have grasped every moment I could have had with you.” Magnus touched the small silver disc. “I wanted to make it right, you know... ask you if you still want to live here with me. But... it’s not going to happen now. Not anymore.”  
Alec stepped closer again. “Magnus, I said stop,” he demanded. “Just... stop.”

Magnus looked at him, that strangely unmoving, artificial face that looked like a drawing of Magnus’ face more than anything else.

“This place is yours now, Alexander, if you still want it.”  
“I don’t want it if I can’t share it with you!” Alec almost yelled at him. “Stop talking like that!”  
And at that something finally seemed to break in Magnus’ demeanor, his calm facade shattering.“I wish I could!” Magnus yelled back. “But I have to go back!”

It was all the more disturbing because his blank face did not match the agitated voice at all.

They stared at each other, chests heaving, and for a while their heavy breaths were the only sound in the room.

“Alexander,” Magnus said eventually. “There was no other way. There is no other way for me. I have to go back.”  
“So you what,” Alec almost snarled, “have to burn yourself through a pentagram again?”

Magnus looked at his feet for a long moment.

“Alexander,” he said then and looked up. “If you love me, then let me go. If you love me, then leave now and don’t watch me do this. I can’t have you look at me without this glamour, as shoddy as it is.”  
“No.” Alec crossed his arms. “Why would you give up like this? Why do you just give up on yourself like that?”  
“Alexander...” Magnus sounded so tired, so hopeless. And that resignation was worse than anything Alec had heard him say so far.  
Alec clenched his jaws. “You know what?” He took a step back. “I won’t. You can’t... maybe you have given up. But I haven’t. I won’t give up on you like that, Magnus. I won’t.”

Magnus shook his head. “Alexander... there is nothing you can do. Believe me, I tried, I tried everything to negotiate another deal with him.”  
Alec just crossed his arms.  
“Maybe...” Magnus took a small, cautious step forward. “Maybe it’s better if you forget me and move on.”  
“Are you out of your mind?!” Alec dropped his arms again. “Are you fucking kidding me?!”  
“Alexander...”  
“No.” Alec flung up his hand in a gesture of finality. “No way! You will not take my memories!”  
“Alexander, believe me it would be better like-”  
“No, it won’t!”  
“At least let me be the one who takes them instead of-”  
“I said no!” Alec curled both hands into fists. “No one is going to touch my memories of you!”  
“You don’t know that,” Magnus whispered, his voice hardly audible.

“No one is going to touch my memories!” Alec took a few deep breaths to calm himself. “And I’m not giving up on you.” He reached out again, but Magnus flinched away.  
“You cannot touch me,” he said, his voice finally breaking at the words. “It burns me. Your angel blood, it...”  
“But...” Alec lost control over his voice for a moment. “But you healed me...”  
“I didn’t have a choice,” Magnus replied tonelessly. “And now go. Please, I beg you. Leave me.”

Alec gritted his teeth, and shook his head.

“I am not going to give up on you, Magnus Bane,” he said again, his voice as hard as stone. “I will fix this.”  
“You can’t fix this, Alexander.”  
Alec took a deep breath to prevent himself from screaming. “I love you!” He said forcefully. “And I am not giving up on you! This is not...” He broke off and buried his fingers into his hair, almost tearing handfuls of it out when he dropped his hands again. “It’s not an option. I am not giving up on you.”

Magnus just shook his head.

“Magnus, listen to me. I will find a way to fix this. And I am not giving up on you.”

Magnus silently shook his head, unable or unwilling to believe him, or maybe both.

Alec wanted to say something else, something to convince Magnus that he wouldn’t be giving up on him, but he had already said all there was to say. And now he couldn’t handle this any longer, he stormed towards the door and slammed it shut behind him. He ran down the stairs, but as soon as he stumbled through the door onto the sidewalk he felt his strength leave him, and he fell against the wall next to the door.

He had to fix this.

He had to. 

There wasn’t a chance that he would leave Magnus to rot in Edom for the rest of eternity. He would get him out of there, and if it was the very last thing he’d ever do. And if he had to travel to Edom himself and kill Asmodeus in his own realm with his bare hands then he would do it.

He had to. 

Magnus was going through all this because of him, of Alec, because he had wanted to save Alec’s parabatai. 

_“Tell me Jace isn’t worth it.”_

He was close to tearing out his hair again. Had he really lost Magnus so he could keep Jace? This had never been supposed to be a choice between two of the most important people in his life...

There was no way he would let it end like this. He didn’t, couldn’t make a decision between the man he loved and his parabatai. He needed them both. And he would not give up until Magnus was back in his life as well.

Alec grabbed his stele and activated his stamina rune, and made his way back to the Institute with heavy steps.

Magnus’ words and his distorted voice were still haunting him. He didn’t even dare to imagine what Asmodeus might have done to him, what he looked like right now, but he didn’t care. There were at least a dozen warlocks in New York alone, and one of them was not only a very skilled healer but also Magnus’ closest friend.

And together, they would fix this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My undying thanks to [apathyinreverie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/apathyinreverie/pseuds/apathyinreverie) and [LaMalefix](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LaMalefix/pseuds/LaMalefix) for their help, feedback, and encouragement.


	2. Chapter 2

Alec was on his last leg as he finally reached the Institute, and there was no use in pretending he could just go on like this. He needed a break. Desperately.

At first he didn’t notice the looks the others gave him, but when he heard the first whisper, he looked up to see a few looks of unmasked disapproval being cast his way. But after what he’d just been through, and what Magnus had told him, his fuse was so short it was practically nonexistent.

“What?” He snapped at one of the two women who had been whispering with each other while staring at him.

“Is your warlock all right?” One of them asked, almost derisively.  
Alec glared at her, not believing his ears. “Seriously?” He exhaled forcefully through his nose. “Are you kidding me? _My_ warlock?”

Before she could say anything else Alec was in her personal space, his hands curled into fists and pressed against his thighs.

“The warlock who freed my parabatai from his demonic possession, you mean?” He snapped. “Is that the warlock you’re talking about?”  
“Alec...” The other woman lifted one hand in a placating gesture. “You should check on your parabatai.”

Something about her words, and how she said them, brought Alec up short and he took a deep, shaky breath. “Where is Jace?”

She wordlessly pointed across the Ops-centre towards the training area. Alec didn’t spare her a second glance and turned away, but almost fell over his own feet as he did so. But he stopped dead in his tracks when he saw Jace sitting on the floor of the training room, his back to the wall, and Izzy next to him with one of her hands on his shoulder.

“Jace...” Alec was almost running again but stumbled up the stairs. “Jace!”

Jace looked up at him, his face pale, his cheeks wet, his eyes swollen and red. Alec fell to his knees on his other side and cast a quick look at Izzy who hardly looked any better.

“Jace,” he said again, and rested a hand on Jace’s other shoulder. His eyes flicked back and forth between his face and Izzy’s, and then he realised he couldn’t see Clary anywhere. A cold feeling of dread crept down his spine. He shook his head. “Oh god, no...”

Jace dropped his head with a soft sob, and Alec stared at his sister, hoping against all hopes that she would tell him he was wrong.

“We don’t know exactly what happened. But there was an explosion that completely annihilated the conservatory on...” Izzy shook her head. “Lilith and Jonathan are gone, but...” she barely suppressed a sob, and a tear ran down her cheek. “They took Clary with them.”

Alec shook his head, his head swimming. This day had to be a nightmare... a demonic possession trying to make Jace kill his parabatai, Magnus imprisoned in Edom, and Clary dead...

“God, Jace...” he whispered, and slung both arms around his brother.

Jace fell into his embrace with a sob and Alec tightened his arms around him, pressing him close, one hand on the back of Jace’s head. He held him and rocked him a little back and forth as Jace went completely to pieces, but didn’t say a word. There were no words that could offer any kind of comfort. There were no words that could make any sense of this situation. There was nothing that could even take the edge off his pain. So Alec held on, and a part of him wished he could just wake up and discover this was all a bad dream.

“Alec,” Izzy said hesitantly after a long time of silence once Jace’s desperate sobs had abated somewhat.  
Alec looked up at her.  
“What about Magnus?” She asked carefully.

Closing his eyes, Alec shook his head. Jace felt the movement and tensed, then pushed himself away from Alec to look at his face.

“Magnus is gone, too?” His voice was so rough it was hardly audible.  
“He is...” Alec shook his head. “He isn’t dead,” he said, and he still couldn’t wrap his head around it. “But he... he made a deal with Asmodeus, to get enough magic to kill the Owl, but... Asmodeus... he...” Alec swallowed and shook his head again. “But the price... the price was... was Magnus himself. He has to stay in Edom with... him, and he put a curse on Magnus so he can’t stay here... he had to go back there.”  
“To Edom?” Jace asked and wiped the back of his hand across his face. “Magnus is his Asmodeus’ prisoner now?”  
“He... yes. Yes, he is.” Alec’s chest tightened at the thought.

Jace gritted his teeth, and Alec could see grief and anger fight for control in his face. But after a moment Jace huffed out a heavy breath and shook his head.

“But he’s alive, right? Magnus is alive?”  
“Yes,” Alec replied, trying not to add the words _for now_. It was bad enough they were in his head.  
“Then we will get him back,” Jace said, his voice cold and flat. “If he’s alive, then we can get him back. And we will.”

Alec stared at him and swallowed. “Jace...”  
“Alec,” Jace said and held out his right arm. “Clary...” His voice broke and he closed his eyes with a grunt before he could continue. “Clary is gone. But Magnus... Magnus is alive. And we will get him back.”  
“Jace, I’ll be going against a greater demon, and you-”  
Jace didn’t even let him finish. “Would you let me stop you if it was me in your place?”

The two stared at each other, and after a deep breath, Alec clasped forearms with his parabatai. “No,” he said. “I wouldn’t.”

Jace nodded, and they embraced again. But when they parted, Jace’s eyes fell onto the hole in Alec’s shirt, and the crusted blood around it. His lips trembled.

“Jace.” Alec pressed his palm against the side of Jace’s face, forcing him to look up again. “That wasn’t you.”  
“I almost killed you,” Jace said miserably, his eyes misting over again.  
“No, you didn’t. The Owl did, not you.”  
“But I almost killed you!”  
“And I killed Clary’s mother!” Alec forced his breathing to remain calm. His head was spinning and his vision was a little fuzzy around the edges. “I killed her!”  
“The demon killed her,” Jace said, but his voice was trembling.  
“That’s exactly my point, Jace. It wasn’t you.”

Jace sniffed and blinked furiously.

“Jace, I know how that feels.” Alec shook his head. “How helpless you feel... how... awful. But... it wasn’t you, Jace. I do not blame you, and I never will.”

Jace stared at him for a moment, but there was a flicker of hope in his eyes. Alec tried to smile, but was hit by a wave of dizziness. The world swayed sideways.

“Alec!” Jace grabbed him by the shoulders.  
“I’m all right,” Alec mumbled, but it didn’t sound convincing, not even to his own ears.  
“Like hell you are,” Jace said, and Alec could feel the last of his strength drain away. Having to take care of his parabatai had let him focus on something other than his own grief and guilt. But his exhaustion was coming back now, with a vengeance.

So he let Jace pull him onto his feet, and slung an arm around Jace’s shoulder when Jace put his arms around Alec to support him. Now it was his turn to focus on his parabatai instead of his own pain.

Alec had to admit with every step how _not_ all right he was. 

His wound didn’t hurt him anymore, but he had definitely overused his runes after being so grievously injured. And he was pretty useless in this state. If he wanted to fight for Magnus he had to try and recover his strength, as much as he could.

His whole body felt like lead when he finally reached his room, and he fell onto the bed with a groan. He was barely able to get rid of his boots and his jeans, and he crawled under the blanket with his last bit of strength. He didn’t even register anymore that Jace switched off the lights.

* * *

A few hours of sleep hadn’t restored Alec completely, but he was now able to move around without risk of falling over. Jace joined him in the kitchen not long after Alec had drained his second coffee, but unsurprisingly he looked as if he hadn’t slept at all. Izzy showed up shortly after that, and the three of them spent some time in silence, drinking coffee and staring at their hands, their cups, or the table.

It was Izzy who finally broke the silence. “Right. I guess we need a plan.”  
“I do,” Alec said and stared into his empty mug. “But I don’t know where to start.”  
“We start with what we know,” Izzy replied. “Asmodeus... Hang on.” She tilted her head with a questioning frown. “Why Asmodeus, of all demons?”

Alec froze, lips parted. He couldn’t lie and say he had no idea. “Magnus said he and Asmodeus have... uh... a history,” he finally dared to say.  
“What kind of history?” Izzy asked slowly.  
Tugging at the hem of his sleeves, Alec shook his head. “It’s not my secret to tell.”

He didn’t dare to hope they wouldn’t figure that out from here. Warlocks were children of demons and mortals. You didn’t need to be a genius to see the ‘history’ Alec was speaking of.

But thankfully Izzy didn’t pry any further, most likely because she didn’t need to. Alec could only hope Magnus would forgive him for this.

“So...” Izzy began after a moment. She had clearly picked up on Alec’s discomfort, and bless her, was trying to not make it worse. “Asmodeus wants him to stay in Edom. Magnus didn’t want it, so Asmodeus cursed him. What does that even mean?”  
“It means,” Alec began, “that Magnus can’t stay topside because it causes him physical pain to be here. That’s what he said.”  
“You talked to him?” Izzy said, her eyes widening.

Alec looked up from his mug and swallowed, but then filled his siblings in on what had happened in Magnus’ loft.

“By the Angel,” Izzy whispered a moment after he had finished. “Poor Magnus...”  
“We’ll get him back,” Jace said and emptied his mug that he all but slammed onto the table. “Alec’s right. Even if Magnus has given up doesn’t mean we have to give up as well.”  
“But if even Magnus wasn’t able to offer Asmodeus a better deal,” Izzy began hesitantly, “how are we supposed to find something?”

“We won’t,” Alec said simply. “There’s only one way.”

Izzy looked at him with puzzlement in her eyes, but Jace tightened his jaw.

Then Jace took a deep breath. “Asmodeus has to die.”

“Jace, he’s a greater demon,” Izzy said slightly incredulously. “He’s a prince of hell, you can’t just kill him.”  
“Every demon, even the greater ones, has a weak spot,” Alec replied. “And I’m going to find it.”

There was a moment of silence. Alec knew that his siblings were ready to fight at his side, even when going up against one of the greatest evils they had ever faced. He was part grateful and part terrified.

“And how are we going to get to Edom?” Jace asked then.

“One step at a time,” Izzy said and drained her coffee. “First, we need to know how to kill Asmodeus. Then we figure out how to find him. And once we get Magnus back, we figure out how to fix him.”

“Maybe we need to find that out before he gets here,” Alec said and pressed his lips together. “He said it causes him pain to be here, so we can’t let him wait for god knows how long once he is back.”  
Izzy nodded slowly. “You’re right. Where do we start with that?”  
“Catarina,” Alec replied after a moment’s thought. “She’s an expert in healing magic. I’ll ask her. If there’s anyone who can find a way to fix Magnus, then it’s her.”  
“Done.” Izzy nodded again. “So you start with Catarina, and Jace and I are going to set up camp in the library and gather everything we can find on Asmodeus.”

Alec got up with a deep sigh. The others followed his lead, and Jace slapped Alec’s upper arm before they parted. His grief and pain was still visible in his eyes, but it was obvious that being able to focus on his parabatai was helping him cope. Jace never fared well without something to occupy him when he was hurting.

As soon as Alec left the Institute he ran into the first snag: he had no idea where Catarina lived. He had visited her a few times, but he had always portalled there with Magnus. But he knew where she worked, and so he made his way to the nearest subway station.

Having reached St Ambrose Hospital Alec immediately headed for reception and asked about Catarina Loss under the pretence of a family emergency. Which wasn’t even a complete lie. The receptionist made a call, and Alec sat down on the nearest chair but didn’t have to wait for long.

“Alec?”

He looked up to see Catarina who was almost sprinting towards him. “What is it? Is it Madzie?”  
“No,” Alec said as he got up. “It’s Magnus.”  
“Magnus?” Catarina tried to catch her breath. “What happened to him?”

Alec inhaled deeply through his nose. “You know, I would have caught you at home because this is really complicated,” he said, lowering his voice, “but I don’t know where you live so I came here instead. This isn’t something we can talk about in a hospital lobby.”

Catarina stared at him for a moment and then exhaled in a heavy huff of breath. “What has he gotten himself into this time?”  
“It’s bad, and he needs us, but it’s not his fault,” Alec said. “So when are you done?”  
“My shift just started,” Catarina said almost apologetically. “But... you know, since this is a family emergency I just say I need to pick up Madzie from the babysitter. Give me twenty minutes or so.”

Alec nodded and sat down again, clasping his hands between his knees. He was twitchy and on edge; every moment that Magnus had to spend in Edom was one moment too long. But even though he logically knew that there was nothing he could do to speed things along, he wanted to scream at everyone to hurry the fuck up.

Catarina was back after ten minutes, but they didn’t exchange another word until they had reached their destination and Catarina had closed the door behind her.

“Talk,” she said and dropped her bag.

“Did you know that Magnus made a deal with Asmodeus?”  
“What?” Catarina stared at him, eyes impossibly wide. “He did what?”  
“He asked him for help because he couldn’t get the magic he needed to fight Lilith,” Alec said, crossing his arms.

Catarina’s eyes filled with tears and she covered her mouth with both hands.

“So you didn’t know.”  
“Are you kidding me?” Catarina dropped her hands again. Tears were trickling down her cheeks. “Do you think I’d have let him do that if I had known?”  
“I knew, and that didn’t change anything either,” Alec snapped. “He tried to get the warlocks to help him and they refused!”  
“Because Rey told us not to!”  
“And what is he, your king and sovereign? Don’t you make your own decisions anymore?”

Catarina wrung her hands for a moment. “Alec, this is warlock business. You don’t understand-”  
“Damn right I don’t understand,” Alec said. “But I don’t care about warlock politics. I only care about Magnus. And I need you to help me. Or will Rey forbid that too?”

Catarina dug the heel of one hand into her right eye, then her left. “Tell me what you need me to do.”

Alec took a deep breath. “Look, I get that Rey is your... leader, and I don’t want to get you into trouble, but I honestly don’t know who else to ask. I don’t think anyone is more qualified for this job than you are.”  
“I let Magnus down once,” Catarina said and swallowed. “I won’t make that mistake again. Tell me what I have to do.”

Alec licked his lips and nodded, then proceeded to relate to Catarina what Magnus had told him the day before. By the time he had finished Catarina was in tears again, but she was fighting for composure once Alec had fallen silent. She produced a Kleenex from her pocket, wiped her eyes and blew her nose, and then crumpled the tissue in her hand as she looked up at Alec again.

“It’s not going to be easy,” she said and Alec could see the guilt in her eyes. “This can’t be solved with a simple healing spell. I will need some time, but I promise... I swear, Alec, I’ll do what I can to get the answers we need as fast as possible.”

Alec took a deep breath and nodded. “Thank you. And if you know anyone who might know something about Asmodeus...”  
“Then I will hold them down until you get there,” Catarina finished for him and slipped the soiled tissue into her pocket. 

Alec inclined his head and nodded again. He turned away and headed for the door, but stopped and, after a moment’s hesitation, turned around again. “Could you...”  
“Portal you to the Institute?” Catarina smiled and lifted her hands, palms forward. “There you go.”  
“Thank you.” Alec rolled his shoulders.  
“I’ll get in touch as soon as I find something.”

Alec nodded a third time and stepped through the portal.

The day was bright and sunny, the sky dotted with white clouds, with a soft breeze rustling in the leaves of the old trees surrounding the church. It was a beautiful day.

And Magnus was trapped in hell.

But not for long. Alec determinedly strode towards the doors of the Institute. Not for long.


	3. Chapter 3

“Ah, my son. Welcome home.”

Magnus ignored the jovial tone and his father’s smile as he strode past him. He still had a room here, again and forever, and he had to force himself not to slam the door shut like a sullen teenager before falling onto the bed.

He could not give his father the satisfaction of seeing his tears.

He stared at his hands and swallowed. His hands. Down here he was able to cast a proper glamour, one that didn’t only change his looks but his whole body. Down here he didn’t only look but also feel like Magnus Bane, former high warlock of Brooklyn, and not a demon spawn with flayed skin, clawed hands, pointy teeth, and without nose or hair.

Oh, how Asmodeus had enjoyed modelling that body for him. Laughing along, as if this was all a game.

But he had made sure Magnus would never have a chance again at having a life topside, with his friends and chosen family. Glamour or no glamour, even if his friends could accept him in his current form, he couldn’t stay close to them because every moment caused him physical agony.

“Magnus.” Asmodeus rapped on Magnus’ door with his cane. “I expect you to share my table for dinner.”

Magnus gritted his teeth, but he knew that Asmodeus would get his will no matter what he did. So he got up and forced his feelings under control. He knew it was an illusion but he still sorted his hair and his make-up, and put his jewellery back on that had fallen off his ears and fingers during the transformation, like his hair that had sizzled off his head.

He was sure that Asmodeus knew perfectly well about Magnus’ thirst for revenge. But they both also knew perfectly well that no matter how powerful Magnus was, Asmodeus was stronger by far.

There was no escape.

Shaking his head, Magnus left his room and joined his father who was mustering him with faint amusement in his golden eyes.

“So,” Asmodeus began conversationally after Magnus had settled down. “What did your beloved angel say?”  
Magnus gritted his teeth. “He wasn’t pleased.”  
Asmodeus laughed. “You don’t say. Tell me... no, no wait.” He leaned forward. “He told you he would fight for you, didn’t he?”

Magnus didn’t reply, but his silence was all the answer his father needed. Asmodeus dropped his head and laughed, and he was shaking his head when he looked up again.

“Don’t worry, son. He won’t fight long. Mortals... their lives nothing but a candle flame in the wind. Flickering one moment, gone the next.”

Staring at the food on his plate, Magnus still didn’t reply.

“You will get over him,” Asmodeus said calmly. “With the passing of the centuries, your memory will fade. And with being here, with me, your true demonic nature will eventually win over that pitiful bit of humanity that is still fighting for control. In the end, you will thank me for giving you the chance to be your true self.”

Now Magnus looked up, pure hatred in his eyes that he had no means and no real desire to suppress.

Asmodeus lifted one eyebrow. “You know I’m right,” he said. “You will forget.”  
“But he won’t,” Magnus said without thinking, and immediately regretted those words the moment they left his lips.  
“Maybe not,” Asmodeus drawled and leaned closer. “But maybe something can... help him forget.”

Magnus jumped out of his chair and bared his teeth at his father. “Don’t you dare touch him!”  
“Oh, I wouldn’t touch him, your precious nephilim,” Asmodeus said calmly. “But honestly. Don’t you think taking his memory would be a kindness? He could move on, and-”  
“I said, don’t touch him,” Magnus snarled.  
“Or else?” Asmodeus asked, looking calm, but the anger in his eyes clearly betrayed the threat in his voice. 

Or else.   
Magnus was reminded again how pointless arguing with his father was. He had absolutely no leverage. Not the slightest bit. He was powerless.

“How about then I take his memories and bring them back here?” Asmodeus said, his eyes aflame. “Then we can look at them together, and you can watch every single one of them crumble to dust. Is that what you want?”

Magnus was gritting his teeth so hard his jaw hurt.

“But lucky for you and your precious nephilim, travelling topside isn’t exactly easy, or pleasant,” Asmodeus went on, but then his suddenly froze and tapped his chin with his forefinger. “Or... you know, you could go ahead, since it’s so much easier for you, and then you can summon me there. A family trip!”  
“Father, don’t do this,” Magnus whispered, shaking his head.  
“I do as I see fit,” Asmodeus replied coldly, dropping his amicable facade. “I need to make a true prince out of you, my son. You may not want it now, but with time, you’ll understand.”

It was pointless to start another argument, so Magnus sat down again. He wondered if it would be a kindness to him if he could forget, forget his life and his friends and Alec, and just give in to Asmodeus’ demands. But his father would never show him the kindness of letting him forget, not for a long time, because he needed any and all means available to him to break him, and he would stop at nothing.

The sudden thought that Asmodeus might not only attack but even torture Alec just to torture Magnus made his blood run cold. He could imagine it perfectly well: Asmodeus kidnapping Alec and dragging him to Edom, to force him to see what Magnus had become, and torture him before Magnus’ very eyes, to the point where death would be merciful. He could do that to every single one of his friends.

Magnus closed his eyes. He had to stop resisting. He had to. He had to make his father believe somehow that Magnus was caving in, that Asmodeus had broken him, so his friends would finally be safe.

But the thought that Asmodeus might demand proof about his change of mind, and what that might be, didn’t bear thinking about.

And Magnus began to wonder if there was a way he could possibly kill himself. Only to discard the thought because of the fear that Asmodeus might get it into his head to take his revenge on those that Magnus cared about.

There was no way out.

* * *

Sitting at his desk, Alec stared at the wood grain in the surface of the wood before him, head in his hands.

It still felt surreal. Magnus had gone to Edom to ask his father for his magic, and now he was forced to stay there forever.

Alec should have stopped him.

Whatever might have happened, there had to have been another way to save Jace, other than Magnus sacrificing himself.

But that was a moot point now. Alec could - and probably would - blame himself for the rest of his life for letting Magnus go to Edom, and it wouldn’t change anything. The only thing he could do was fix this. And he would. He didn’t know yet what else he could do, but now at least Catarina knew, and she was working on figuring out how to restore Magnus’ body once they had gotten him out of his father’s claws.

Because Alec would get Magnus back. Anything else wasn’t an option. 

But for that, he first needed to figure out how to overcome Asmodeus, and that wasn’t something you do in an afternoon’s work. He needed to know more, he needed to know his weakness, and then he needed to come up with a plan of attack.

His thoughts were running a mile a minute, and he eventually grabbed a notebook and a pen in the hopes he might be able to sort them, and to be able to make sure he wouldn’t forget anything.

_“Maybe... Maybe it’s better if you forget me and move on.”_

“Definitely not,” Alec hissed through gritted teeth. “Not a chance.”

_“Maybe... Maybe it’s better if you forget me and move on.”_   
_“Are you out of your mind? Are you fucking kidding me?!”_   
_“Alexander...”_   
_“No. No way! You will not take my memories!”_   
_“Alexander, believe me it would be better like-”_   
_“No it won’t!”_   
_“At least let me be the one who takes them instead of-”_   
_“I said no! No one is going to touch my memories of you!”_   
_“You don’t know that...”_

You don’t know that.

Alec narrowed his eyes. Who would touch his memories? Asmodeus?

Staring at the squiggly lines and loops and spirals he had doodled, Alec felt his heart begin to beat faster. Would Asmodeus go through the trouble of travelling topside only to take his memories?

He scribbled down the thought on the paper before him.

_Would Asmodeus take my memories?_

He underlined those words, and circled them for good measure.

_“At least let me be the one who takes them instead of-”_

Maybe he would. He would take Alec’s memories just to be able to torture Magnus with it, to dash Magnus’ last crumbling hope that Alec might be able to save him. Or maybe he could even take them and do what Magnus had done with the little memory he had given to Clary. Make them physical somehow, and make Magnus watch him destroy them.

Alec knew he had a reputation of always expecting the worst, always thinking in worst-case scenarios, of being Alec Lightwood the aggressive pessimist. He might be exaggerating, or putting far too much significance on himself in this matter, yet the fact remained that it was a possibility, and Alec refused to give Asmodeus that sort of leverage. But while he could maybe physically fight a greater demon, he had no means to fight manipulative demonic magic trying to meddle with his mind. He probably wouldn’t even notice it until it was too late. 

Alec tore the page out of the notebook and started writing again. He made a list of bullet points, paused for thought, wrote a few more, and crossed others out, all while his other hand was wreaking havoc with his hair.

In the end he took yet another page and copied the list in a cleaner script. Then he looked at it and took a deep breath.

It was risky. Engaging Asmodeus was outright dangerous, and going against a greater demon was a mission the Clave would most definitely not approve of. On top of that he couldn’t risk his siblings, or anyone else who he had to involve to help, to go down with him should he fail.

His phone rang that very moment, and lost in thought as he was Alec almost jumped out of his skin. He needed a few breaths to calm himself.

“Yes.”  
 _“Alec? It’s Catarina.”_  
“Catarina!” Alec looked up at the door, but it was closed. “Hang on.”

He dropped the phone and took his stele, then drew a large silencing rune on the door. Then he quickly grabbed his phone again and walked towards the other end of the room, as far away from the door as possible.

“I had to put a silencing rune up. What is it?”  
 _“I found something, but not the whole solution,”_ Catarina said. _“The problem is that I need something of Magnus’, something of his body. We found a restoration ritual, but it’s a complicated thing and needs a lot of preparation and ingredients, the most important bit being a part of Magnus from before he was transformed.”_  
“Like blood?” Alec leaned against the wall.  
 _“Blood would be the easiest, but I know we don’t have such luck. The problem is I can’t find anything.”_ Catarina took a shaky breath, and her voice was unsteady as she continued. _“I’ve been to Magnus’ place, and I combed the whole apartment up and down for hours. Magnus is always so tidy, he styles himself with magic... I couldn’t even find a single hair.”_

Alec dragged a hand down his face. He hadn’t expected this to be easy, but for everything to flatline because of a single hair...

Hair. 

He dropped his hand again. “Hang on. Hang on. I’ll call you back.”

Alec took a few deep breaths and threw the phone onto his desk on his way out. He all but ran downstairs and let himself into the sealed vault with a rune only the head of the Institute knew.

It took him some time rooting around in drawers and files, but he finally found it and grabbed the tiny paper envelope with a growl of triumph.

For a moment he had to fight the shame and the memories of the horrible feeling of wrongness that the moment back then had caused him, but this past mistake might be what could save Magnus now.

He barely remembered to seal the door again behind him, and he ran back to his room as fast as he could, grabbed his phone, and headed for the main doors, forcing himself not to run there too to avoid drawing attention to him. He was dialling Catarina’s number as soon as he had stepped outside.

“Catarina?” He stumbled to a halt. “Can you portal to the Institute?”  
 _“Now?”_  
“Yes. I think I got something.”

Catarina hung up without another word, and moments later a portal appeared not too far away from him.

“What is it?” She came running over, and Alec jogged towards her.  
“This.” Alec offered her the tiny envelope.

Catarina took it and opened it, and her eyes widened when she saw the hair.

“It’s not one of my proudest moments,” Alec said and pressed his lips against his teeth. “I don’t know if it’s enough, just a few hairs with roots.... but it’s the only thing I got.”  
“It’s exactly what we need,” Catarina said and carefully closed the envelope again. “It’s not going to be easy, as I said, and it requires a lot more work if this is all we have. But it’s something, and we can work with that.”

Alec huffed out a heavy breath. “Okay... now listen. This is important.”  
Catarina looked at him and nodded.  
“Look, I know... I know what I ask of you can be dangerous. We’re going against Asmodeus. He’s a greater demon, and a prince of hell.”  
“I know that,” Catarina replied simply.

“But we’re probably going against the Clave too, because I can’t imagine they will sanction a mission against a greater demon like that,” Alec went on. “So... I think it’s safest for you if there’s as little connection between us as possible. You need to delete my number, and every other number connected with Shadowhunters. I’ll text you Izzy’s number, but you need to write that down somewhere, preferably without a name, and delete her number as well. Do not, under no circumstances, contact me or Izzy, unless it’s a matter of life or death. Izzy will let you know when Asmodeus is dead, and then you can do what you need to do to get Magnus back. Keep it secret as much as you can and don’t contact me, so nothing points back to you if anything goes wrong.”

Catarina nodded slowly. “Anything else?”

Alec pondered it for a moment. “Stay safe,” he said eventually. “You know what we’re facing.”  
She calmly met his eyes. “You too, Alec. Magnus will be absolutely devastated if something were to happen to you while you’re trying to save him. Also, don’t worry about me. I am not alone. I found another warlock who is willing to help me save Magnus, and I know she can keep a secret. We will get him back.” She rested her hand against Alec’s upper arm. “We will get him back, Alec.”  
Alec managed a small smile. “We will.”

Because anything else was not an option. He didn’t need to say that, it was clearly written in Catarina’s eyes.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter starts with a nasty nightmare, just saying.

_“Magnus!”_

_The scream cut through the silent darkness._

_“Magnus! Help me!”_

_It was pitch black, so dark you couldn’t see your hand in front of your eyes. Magnus stumbled around in the darkness, and every time Alec screamed his name, his heart was about to break free from his chest._

_“Alexander!” He stopped, trying to pinpoint the direction his voice was coming from. “Alec!”_

_“Magnus! Magnus, please help me!”_

_Magnus tried to use magic to light his way, but it didn’t work. So he stumbled on, trying to find the way, trying to get to Alec who was calling for help. And Alec’s voice rose, and rose. He was screaming._

_“Magnus!!”_

_And then finally, Magnus could see light. And he could see Alec, chained spread-eagled to a wall._

_“Alec!”_

_But whatever reaction Magnus had expected, it wasn’t this. It wasn’t the horrified scream, the eyes widening in terror, the desperate tearing at his shackles._

_“MAGNUS! MAGNUS HELP ME!”_

_“Alexander!” Magnus reached for him. “Alexander, I am right here!”_

_Magnus touched him. And his claws left deep, red gashes in Alexander’s flesh. He jumped back with a horrified gasp._

_“Alexander, I’m so sorry...” He reached out again, but even touching him without claws made Alec scream. His flesh was burning and sizzling where it came in contact with Magnus’ skin._

_And he was still screaming for Magnus._

_Because he had no idea that the monster who was torturing him now was Magnus who was trying to free him._

_“He shouldn’t have come.”_

_Magnus spun around to stare at his father, who looked at him with an unmoving face while leaning on his cane._

_“Father, let him go.” Alec’s screams were cutting into his soul like knives. “He is here because of me... let him go, please. Do with me what you want, but please, let him go!”_

_“He brought this onto himself,” Asmodeus replied, voice bar of all emotion. “There’s nothing I can do.”_

_And with that, he turned around, and walked away._

_“Father...”_

_Magnus wanted to follow him but then Alec screamed his name again, and he spun around to stare at his shackled, tortured lover. He couldn’t free him. Only Asmodeus could._

_“Father!” he set off after him. “Father!”_

_And behind him, Alec’s desperate, tortured screams were tearing Magnus’ mind and soul apart._

_“Magnus!”_

“Magnus!”

Magnus jerked awake, tangled in sheets moist with sweat and tears.

“Magnus!” His father hammered his cane against the door. “Get out of bed, I need to speak with you.”

Magnus listened to his footsteps and the clicking of his cane, growing fainter and fainter. Only when he was sure Asmodeus was out of earshot did he let himself fall back with a hoarse sob, throwing an arm across his face.

He knew his Alexander, his brave, stubborn warrior. Knew that there was every chance that he would truly try to come here and save him.  
And he prayed to the heavens, hoping they might listen for Alec’s sake if not for his own, that they would stop him from doing something horribly stupid and rash.

* * *

With the first item on his list taken care of, Alec headed back to the Institute to check if Izzy and Jace had made any progress in the library, although he doubted it as they couldn’t have been at it for long. He also doubted that there would be much information on Asmodeus in their pathetic little library at all, but it couldn’t hurt to try.

His plan was already getting more risky now, and he needed to put more thought into it to be able to pull it through without the Clave noticing what he was doing and calling him off. Because he would not be stopped, not by Asmodeus, not by the Clave, and not by Raziel himself, before Magnus was back in his arms. And if that meant he would end up excommunicated and de-runed - that was a price he was willing to pay.

Alec checked on Izzy and Jace who, unsurprisingly, hadn’t found anything yet. And now he had to keep them as much in the dark as he could, while still needing them to back him up somehow and cover for his absence. Because his next stop would be Alicante.

He did check the Institute’s archives for the information he needed, just to be sure, but he wasn’t surprised or disappointed when he couldn’t find what he was looking for.

Both Izzy and Jace tried to change his mind, and to come up with a different solution, desperately trying to keep him from implementing the next step of his plan. They too knew perfectly well how dangerous this could become.

“I don’t have a choice,” he said. “We can’t find the information I need here.”

Izzy and Jace exchanged a look.

“And I need you here to cover for me,” he went on. “I hate to ask this of you. I don’t want to involve you in this, because at one point we will most likely be going against the Clave.”  
“Because they won’t want us to engage a greater demon.” Jace said, folding his arms on the table.  
Alec nodded. “I can’t imagine they’re going to like the idea. I mean, I get it. If this goes wrong we have an enraged greater demon on the loose here in the middle of New York.”  
“But how are you so sure he will come here at all?” Izzy asked him, chewing on her lip.  
“I’m not,” Alec replied, though in truth he was more than sure that Asmodeus would come after him, or at least his memories. “But I want to be prepared.”  
“And how would he get here anyway without being summoned?” Jace added.  
“I don’t know.” Alec shrugged. “But Azazel showed up here when he was after the mortal cup, and I sincerely doubt that Valentine summoned him.”

Jace and Izzy both nodded after a moment of thoughtful silence.

“So you will go to Alicante,” Izzy said then. “To find out how to kill Asmodeus?”  
“Yes. It’s our only chance.”

There was another reason he had to go to Idris, but he wouldn’t tell them that. He needed to protect his memories somehow, and the fewer people knew, the less risk there was of his plan getting exposed and ruined. Not that he didn’t trust his siblings to keep their silence, but he wanted to be as safe as possible. And if they didn’t know, not even the Soulsword could reveal anything about his plans if something went wrong.

“I hope you know what you’re doing,” Izzy said then with a sigh. “But you know we always got your back, big brother.”  
“Thanks.” Alec managed a smile.  
“Hey,” Jace said and put a hand on Alec’s. “Three go in.”  
“Three come out,” Izzy added and put her hand on top of Jace’s. “We got you.”

Alec’s smile became a little less forced. He really didn’t want his sister and his parabatai involved in this, but he couldn’t completely avoid it. Not to even mention how pissed they’d be if he excluded them entirely. Still, he could only hope they wouldn’t come to regret it.

* * *

Before leaving for Alicante, Alec had one more thing to prepare, but it was something he couldn’t talk about, not even to Izzy or Jace. His need for secrecy while protecting the people he cared about was stressing him more than he wanted to admit, but everything had to go as planned, simply because anything else wasn’t an option. It was the one thought that had been haunting him since leaving Magnus in the loft. Failure wasn’t an option.

He sat down at his desk and took a sheet of writing paper, watermarked with his initials. He wrote a very long letter, spent a lot of time thinking about how to phrase things, how to express what he needed to say without leaving any doubt or room for interpretation, and when he was finally satisfied, he sealed it first with wax and then with his stele. He packed a few changes of clothes because he didn’t know how long he would be gone, and then took one last look around his room.

After a moment he nodded, took the letter, grabbed his shoulder bag, and left his room to find Izzy. She was in the Ops-center talking to a group of Shadowhunters, debriefing them on their mission, and Alec just passed them and asked Izzy to see him in his office before leaving them to finish.

As soon as Izzy entered his office Alec closed the door and drew a silencing rune across it.

“This is important,” Alec said and produced the letter, “but I can’t tell you what it is because the less you know, the better. And I don’t want to hear that you can handle danger, because I know you can. I just need an additional level of precaution.” He smiled and rested one hand on her shoulder, but then his face turned serious again. “Don’t talk about this letter. Not to anyone, not even to me. If we don’t talk about this, no one will even accidentally hear about it. You have to keep it safe where no one can find it. Once this is all over you can give it back to me. But as long as Asmodeus isn’t gone and Magnus isn’t back, you have to keep it safe. We can’t risk revealing any details of our plan to anyone.”

“But… is this your will?” Izzy said hesitantly after taking the letter. “Because I-”  
“I can’t take any chances, Izzy.” Alec squeezed her shoulders and let go. “You need to keep this safe for me.”  
“I get it.” She tried to smile, but he could see the worry in her eyes. “You can count on me, big brother.”  
“I know I can,” Alec said with a smile. “That’s why I asked you. I hate to drag you into this, but maybe we can keep relatively safe if we never talk about any of this again until this is all over. Do not talk about Asmodeus or Magnus when I come back. Don’t talk about him at all, even when I’m gone. Do you understand? It’s important, more important than anything else.”  
“Keep the letter hidden until Asmodeus is dead and Magnus is back, don’t talk about anything in the meantime. Got you. I’ll let Jace know but I’m going to be careful.  
“Thank you.” Alec pulled her into a firm embrace. “Thank you, Izz.”

Since he was head of the Institute he didn’t have to request a portal to Idris, and he left his sister in charge of the Institute after giving her another hug.

It was late afternoon when he set foot in Idris, and he was more than surprised to see who was waiting to welcome him.

“Lydia?”  
Lydia smiled at him. “I heard you were coming, and I wanted to see how you are. How’s Magnus?”  
“He’s...” Alec realised that he needed some cover story, and had a brief moment of panic.  
“Is... everything okay with you and Magnus?” Lydia asked, honest concern in her voice.  
“We... ah...” Alec cleared his throat. “We had an... argument.”  
Lydia smiled and patted his arm. “I’m sure you’ll work it out. Couples can’t really see eye to eye on everything.”  
“Yeah, I know.” Alec shouldered his bag. “He’s... away on a warlock mission, and now I’m here, so we both have some time to cool off. We’ll figure this out.”  
“I don’t doubt that,” Lydia replied with a smile. “So, what brings you here?”

“I need to use the great library,” Alec replied while Lydia followed him down the hallway. “I need some information on a greater demon that I can’t find in my institute.”  
“A greater demon?” Lydia tilted her head. “Which one?”  
“Asmodeus,” Alec replied. “We heard rumours that he showed his face in New York.”  
“You know you can’t just engage a greater demon like that.” Lydia lifted both eyebrows.  
“I know.” Alec looked up at her. “But in case we have to, I want to be prepared.”  
“The Clave won’t let you do that alone. Engaging a greater demon requires clearance from Idris.”  
“I know.” Alec met her eyes. “But I might not have a choice, and in that case I need to know how to engage him. I can’t have a prince of hell wreaking havoc in New York, and the Clave can’t ignore that fact.”  
“They can’t,” Lydia said and stopped at the doors to the library. “And after all, you have a lot of very capable fighters. But please… don’t do anything rash. I know you don’t trust the Clave much after what happened, but…”  
“I really don’t want to go against Clave orders,” Alec replied. “But if we suddenly have a prince of hell running amok in New York, then they can’t expect me to sit on my hands while I wait to hear back from Idris.”  
“I’m sure they won’t,” Lydia replied firmly. “They are aware of the threat of a greater demon.”

Alec nodded, but he honestly had his doubts about the Clave being particularly fast in making decisions, even in moments like that.

“You know what,” Lydia said. “I’ll see if I can free some time. I could help you, if you want?”  
“That... that’d be great,” Alec said as his eyes roamed the gigantic dimensions of the library. There were thousands upon thousands of books here, but thankfully, also a very sophisticated cataloguing system. “I’ll take all the help I can get.”  
“Great. I’ll see you later, then.”

Alec dropped his bag and walked towards the main archive terminal. He pulled up a list of every item that contained information about Asmodeus, and was dismayed to see how little there actually was.

By the time Lydia joined him he had gathered the books, only six in total, and he and Lydia spent a few hours going through them. They learned about Asmodeus’ reign in Edom, and his powers and characteristics, but nothing about any weaknesses or special vulnerabilities.

“There has to be something,” Alec said, dropping the last book in frustration.

Lydia put her book down and let her eyes roam across the surrounding shelves. “There’s one more place you can ask,” she said slowly.  
“And that is?” Alec immediately leaned forward, desperate for anything that could get him the information he needed.  
“The Silent Brothers. They know far more about demons than any book. And hopefully, they’ll be willing to share that information with you.”

Alec nodded slowly. It seemed the only logical step from here. Since not even the library in Alicante could provide him with the information that he needed, the Silent Brothers were his last chance. He knew it would risk exposing himself and his plans, and the Clave forbidding him from going through with it. Not that he would let that stop him, as such. But he could do without the additional obstacle.

And he also had to consider that the Silent Brothers might not actually be willing to share that information with him. Because Alec wouldn’t be able to hide his plans from them, since you couldn’t lie to them.

But it was the only chance he had.

Lydia bade him a good night, but instead of finding the room she had organized for him Alec went back to the research terminal, but he didn’t look for books this time. After several hours, he had finally found what he needed for the other part of his plan after searching several databases of warlocks all over the world, because he still hadn’t solved the problem about protecting his memories.

He caught a scant three hours of sleep on a sofa in the back of the library before he grabbed his bag at sunrise, and after activating his stamina rune and drawing a nourishment one into his palm, he left to find the Silent Brothers.

* * *

_**What is it that you want, Shadowhunter?** _

Alec took a deep breath. “I need information about a greater demon,” he replied. “I can’t find what I need to know in any book I checked.”

_**What greater demon is it you seek knowledge about?** _

“Asmodeus.”

_**And what kind of knowledge do you seek?** _

“I need to know how to kill him.”

_**You are aware that you cannot kill a greater demon?** _

“Not with normal weapons,” Alec replied. “But every greater demon has a weakness, and I need to find that of Asmodeus.”

The moment of truth.

The Silent Brother didn’t need eyes to make Alec feel as if he was looking right into his soul. Alec could do nothing but look at his face, where his eyes should be, and pray.

_**The knowledge you seek, Alexander Gideon Lightwood, will lead you on a dangerous path.** _

“I know.” Alec rolled his shoulders. “But I made sure, as much as I could, that the danger is to me alone.”

Another long moment passed, in which Alec had to force himself not to fidget.

_**Follow me.** _

Alec held in the breath that threatened to escape him in a huff of relief, because this was only the first hurdle.

He stood in the doorway where he had been told to wait for long enough that his knees and back began to hurt, while the Silent Brothers at the other end of the room were debating in eerie silence. And finally, one of them turned away and headed his way. Alec’s throat was too dry to swallow.  
This was it.

_**We have decided to share our knowledge with you, Alexander Gideon Lightwood.** _

“Thank you,” Alec replied, inclining his head.

_**Asmodeus cannot be killed, unless by angel blood.** _

Alec looked up at the Silent Brother again. “I don’t understand.”

**_No weapon and no wound will do more than destroy his current form and send him back to Edom. However, if you infuse the wound with angel blood, he will perish and die, never to arise again._ **

Angel blood.

Alec had to fight the heavy, bitter taste of defeat. Where on earth could he get angel blood? But then he bit his lips as a thought occurred to him.

“Does it have to be pure angel blood?” He asked. “Or is the blood of a nephilim enough?”

_**It might be. We cannot tell you any more. It has never been attempted.** _

Well, that was still definitely better than nothing. Because Alec now knew that there was a way to kill Asmodeus at all. And that was so much more than he had had even moments before.

Still, he would get only one chance to face Asmodeus anyway, because the prince of hell surely wouldn’t let him walk away from the fight to risk another one. So Alec had to be able to kill him after coating his blade with his own blood, because to free Magnus, Asmodeus had to die. He didn’t like to think about Asmodeus taking him down with him, but Magnus would be free then, and that was the only thing that truly mattered.

He thanked the Silent Brothers, and headed back into the world of the living.

“Did you find what you are looking for?” Lydia asked him. She had been waiting for him at the gates.  
“I did,” Alec said with a sigh. “It’s not going to be easy, but I didn’t expect it to be.”  
“So I assume you need a portal back home?”  
Alec nodded, attempting a smile. “I need a portal, yes.”

What he didn’t tell her was that he wasn’t going to portal back to New York, but she had no way of knowing, and he strongly doubted she would call him to check if he had arrived safely.

A trip through a portal later, and he was leaving the Mumbai Institute without anyone confronting him. Once he was at the airport, he found a plane that would bring him to his destination, a city he couldn’t portal to because he hadn’t been there yet. But it was only a five-hour flight from Mumbai to Addis Ababa, and once Alec was on the plane, he stared out of the window and prayed to anyone who would care to listen that this journey would not be in vain.


	5. Chapter 5

_My dearest Alexander,_

_After how we parted I don’t know if you will ever read this, but I shall put this here nonetheless and hope._

_I tried to explain how this all came to pass, how it all went so horribly wrong. I just need you to believe me that I really tried my best to negotiate a different deal with my father. What made me cave in, in the end, was the vision he showed me, of the Owl trying to kill you with your own arrow. I was running out of time, and so I agreed. And I barely managed to save you and Jace as it was._

_I won’t lie to you. I hurt, I don’t want to do this, and I am terrified. Asmodeus owns me now, body and soul. There’s nothing I can do about it, and there is absolutely nothing you can do about it either._

_Alexander, I appreciate it so much that you said you wouldn’t give up on me. But there is nothing anyone can do. Because no matter what you do, it will only enrage Asmodeus and bring him up against us both. He is a ruler of hell, and he can be unbelievably, horribly cruel. He would torture one of us just to make the other suffer, although he might prefer to torture you and force me to watch it. Please, Alexander, I beg you, don’t antagonise him. He will punish us both._

_I know you wouldn’t hear about having your memories erased, and as much as it hurts me, I still believe it would be better for you. I would like to think you can find happiness again. And while I will not be_

“Love letters?”

Magnus flinched and dropped the quill. “Father, I know this is your house, but this is my room, so why can’t you just knock?”

Asmodeus didn’t grace his son with a reply. He walked across the room, the clacking of his cane ever so slightly off-beat with his steps. It made Magnus want to scream.

“I hope it is not your sweet little nephilim you’re writing to,” Asmodeus said. “Because that would be pointless, and... let’s say, absolutely feeble-minded.”  
Gritting his teeth, Magnus didn’t reply.  
“I need you to forget about that angel boy for a moment,” Asmodeus said and snapped his fingers. The letter went up in flames. “We have visitors.”

Magnus looked at the remnants of the parchment that he had hoped to send as a fire message and got up. He forced himself to not look at the ashes again as he followed his father out of the room and across the hall.

“Magnus, meet my dearest friend, Allmunoth, one of the lieutenants of the Lord of Greed.”

Magnus looked at the male demon who mustered him with cold eyes, and inclined his head.

“That is your son, Asmodeus?” Allmunoth’s voice sounded like someone was pouring gravel into a bucket. “He looks like a catamite.”  
Asmodeus sighed. “It’s the way he chooses to glamour himself,” he said and cast his son a cold look. “I am still trying to get him to embrace his true nature. I’m afraid the fault is entirely mine, I have neglected him for too long while he was up there with those puny mortals.”

Magnus exhaled through his nose. “You are aware that I am standing right here, yes?”

“I’m not sure he’s worthy, Asmodeus,” Allmunoth said as if Magnus was indeed not standing right there.  
“He will be,” Asmodeus said. “He hasn’t been home for long. But he will be. Come on, son, show him your true form.”

Since there was nothing Magnus could do, he dropped his glamour. The two cloaked figures that were flanking the demon, who looked at him with slightly more interest now, sidled closer.

“You may be right after all, old friend,” Allmunoth said to Asmodeus. “Spending too much time topside has never done anyone good.”  
“I was hoping you’d say that,” Asmodeus replied smoothly, then turned to face his son again.

“Magnus, my dear son, I now want you to meet Azolan and Kizzath, Allmunoth’s beautiful daughters.”

The figures flanking the demon lieutenant dropped their cloaks, and Magnus felt his stomach turn. Not because they were ugly, quite the contrary. They were unearthly beautiful, what little clothing they were wearing leaving barely anything to imagination. They had delicate wings and long nails and Magnus didn’t need anyone to tell him what he was looking at.

“A strong and fitting union,” Asmodeus said and poured five glasses of wine, then smiled at Magnus as he handed him one. “Have you ever lain with a succubus, my son? Oh, just imagine being married to two of them.”

Magnus’ mind was numb. He was barely able to force himself to look outwardly calm as he took the glass, even as he felt his insides turn to ice.

* * *

It took Alec two hours to find the address in Addis Ababa, and he still needed another moment of mental fortification before he knocked on the door.

But nothing happened.

Alec ran his hands through his hair and knocked again. His nerves were getting the better of him; the longer he stood here the more he began to doubt his plan. But the problem was that he needed the help of a warlock who was powerful enough, and had no connection to New York. There wasn’t even a guarantee that there was anything a warlock could do to help him, no matter how powerful, but he had to try.

He was about to knock for a third time when he finally heard steps, and then the door was opened by a girl who reminded Alec very much of Madzie, even though she was older than the little warlock Alec knew. Small buds of horns on her forehead clearly told him she was a warlock child as well.

“Hello,” Alec said, and suddenly realised that he had no idea if the girl spoke English at all. “I need to speak with Sinidu Kidane.”  
She just stared at him.  
“Sinidu Kidane?” Alec tried again.

The girl closed the door in his face and walked away. Alec dropped his head with a frustrated groan. He was debating if there might be another way to contact the warlock when he heard steps again, but this time the door was opened by a woman.

Her face was framed by long, delicate braids, the greenish-golden scales surrounding her eyes contrasting starkly with her dark skin. Her eyes had no iris; they were of the same green as her scales, and they had a narrow black slit as pupil. She didn’t blink either, which was the most unsettling part of her appearance.

“What do you want, Shadowhunter?” It couldn’t have been said with more disdain.  
Alec cleared his throat. “I am in need of your service.”  
“And what would my services be that you can’t see them satisfied elsewhere?”  
“I heard you are the best,” Alec replied, but didn’t even try to smile. “It took me a long time to find a warlock who might be able to help me.”

She kept staring at him, and Alec felt something cold crawling up his spine, as if some deeply buried part of him suddenly remembered he was nothing but a naked little mammal staring at a deadly predator. Which was ridiculous. He had never been afraid of a warlock before, but this woman looked and felt dangerous. Yet Alec didn’t have a choice.

“Where are you from, Shadowhunter?”  
“New York.”  
A humourless smile appeared on her face. “You must be desperate to come all this way.”  
“I am,” Alec replied simply. There was no sense in denying it.

After what felt like an eternity, the warlock finally stepped aside and nodded. Alec swallowed hard, inclined his head, and stepped past her through the door. It fell shut behind him with an ominous thud.

He followed her down a narrow flight of stairs into a windowless room, the walls lined with shelves filled with books, scrolls, vials, bottles and oddities he couldn’t even begin to identify. It had a similar atmosphere as Magnus’ study but at the same time, felt totally alien as well.

When he looked at the warlock again she had glamoured her eyes and scales which made it a little easier to look at her. Her lidless snake eyes had given Alec the creeps.

She wordlessly walked over to a table and poured a dark liquid from a calabash into a small bowl that she handed him. It smelled like coffee, but Alec was unable to relax.

“Now, Shadowhunter,” she said. “Let us discuss business.”

* * *

When Alec finally stumbled out of the portal in front of the Institute it was already getting dark. He was tired, as if the last portal journey had drained all his remaining strength out of him. On the other hand, the city having been invaded by a greater demon had taken its toll on everyone, and now they faced the next threat by another one. He felt as if he was not quite at home in his own skin anymore, as if he was standing two steps away and watching himself from the outside. He was exhausted, and had been for days, but there was no rest for the weary.

Izzy immediately ran up to meet him when she saw him enter the Ops-Center.

“Alec!” She gave him a worried once-over. “Are you okay?”  
Alec nodded. “Just tired. I’m fine.”

She continued to watch him worriedly and Alec knew she wanted answers. He nodded and the two made their way into Alec’s office, picked up Jace on the way, and again, Alec sealed the door with a silencing rune.

“I found what we need,” Alec said then without further ado. “But I was right and the Clave will not sanction an unplanned move against a greater demon.”  
“Unplanned?” Jace crossed his arms.  
“Unplanned by them, apparently.” Alec dropped his bag. “Lydia told me that the Clave always wants to be the one who calls the shots when a greater demon is concerned.”  
Jace licked his lips and leaned against the desk. “And we’re supposed to wait until they are done playing their little power games and let Asmodeus run wild in New York?”  
“I don’t know what they’re thinking,” Alec replied. “But the point is, if I engage Asmodeus before the Clave sends whoever it is they want to send, then I’m going directly against Clave orders.”  
“We,” Izzy said pointedly, “are going against Clave orders.”  
“No.” Alec shook his head. “I can’t have you two be caught in this as well. If there’s anyone going against the Clave, it’s me. I can’t have you two caught with me if this goes wrong.”

Izzy and Jace exchanged a look.

“Do you seriously believe we let you run into this alone?” Jace asked, the ‘ _you idiot_ ’ clear even if unvoiced.  
“Seriously, Alec, we’re a team,” Izzy added.

Alec sighed and looked first at his parabatai, then at his sister. “Izzy, you’ve been threatened with excommunication and de-runing already. Isn’t once enough?”  
Izzy bit her lips. “We can’t let you do that alone,” she repeated.  
“I want to do this alone,” Alec replied. “I have to do this alone. I have to find and engage Asmodeus. And you-”  
“Were’ not going to sit here twiddling our thumbs while you risk your life,” Jace cut in.

Alec dragged his hands down his face.

“Look,” he said after a moment. “I also risk antagonizing the Clave. I risk excommunication and de-runing.”  
“And what makes you think you’re supposed to shoulder that alone?” Izzy said and stepped closer.  
“The fact that I don’t want you to go through that as well,” Alec said and tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear.

A small smile appeared on Isabelle’s face. “Alec... I get it.” She took one of his hands. “But if we do this together we have a chance. If you do this alone... you can’t seriously think you can win against a greater demon on your own? When it can be three against one?”

Alec didn’t want to tell them. He really, really didn’t. Because he knew that as soon as he mentioned angel blood, they would do everything in their power to stop him from going, and he wouldn’t put locking him up somewhere beyond them.

“Look,” he said instead. “I’m tired. I just... can we talk about this again tomorrow?”

Thankfully, they let him off the hook. For now at least. He knew that the discussion wasn’t over, and that there wasn’t anything he could do to convince his siblings to let him do that alone.

But the fact remained that this was a suicide mission, no matter how you looked at it. He needed to engage Asmodeus and give him a lethal, or at least near-lethal injury. And that injury had to be somehow imbued with angel blood, and he could only hope that his nephilim blood would be enough. Which meant, in short, that after wounding himself enough to coat the blade with his blood, he had one shot of jumping Asmodeus and killing him.

It wasn’t a good plan. Alec had never believed it was, but he had tried all other sources of information available to him and this was the only solution he had been able to come up with. He certainly wouldn’t use any of his siblings to draw blood, and he certainly wouldn’t tell them his plan because they would do everything they could do stop him.

Alec had never been so sure of anything in his life. The heavy feeling of foreboding that had enveloped him ever since he had stepped out of the portal was still there, the threat of Asmodeus hanging over him like Damocles’ blade. He knew that if Asmodeus showed his face here in New York, Alec would have to kill him. Not send him back to Edom, no, he would kill him. Once and for all.

But for now, he needed rest. He was not only tired, he was absolutely exhausted, his reserves drained dry. He would catch up on sleep, and tomorrow he would talk to his siblings again. He crawled into his bed and stared at the ceiling.

Alec hadn’t thought he would be able to sleep with his mind racing into several different directions all at once, but when he woke up and checked his phone, he discovered it was his usual time and that he had slept more than six hours. Izzy and Jace would most likely not be up already, which was fine since he needed to keep his thoughts to himself for a while to work on his plan.

He briefly wondered if he should leave the Institute and find a place to lie low somewhere, but immediately discarded that thought. He needed to be around the Institute’s monitoring system that would alert them to the presence of a greater demon, and even though he knew he wouldn’t be able to just give his siblings the slip like that once they knew Asmodeus was here, he couldn’t leave before that.

Coffee in hand, Alec watched one of the monitors in the Ops-center and listened to the soft voices around him. The night shift was ending, and a few more Shadowhunters came home from patrol. Nothing out of the ordinary had happened that night, nothing that could announce the coming of a greater demon.

But Alec had a plan now. So, whenever Asmodeus appeared, Alec would be ready for him.


	6. Chapter 6

Magnus was about to combust. He had never felt so helpless and so furious at the same time.

“Absolutely not!”

His father watched his furious pacing with faint amusement in his eyes.

“I will not marry either of them!”

Asmodeus crossed his arms, still a mild smile on his face. “My dear boy...”  
“I am not your boy!” Magnus screamed and stormed towards him.

A flick of Asmodeus’ hand, and he was flung against the nearest wall.

“My dear boy,” Asmodeus began again, his tone less mild. “You have to face the facts. You will never go back, and you will forget that nephilim boy anyway.” Then he leaned forward. “Just accept it already.”

Magnus picked himself up and dusted down his jacket. He had put his glamour back on because he was nowhere near to accepting that hideous body as his true form.

“I will not marry them.”  
“That is not for you to decide.” Asmodeus leaned back in his chair.

They stared at each other for a moment, but Magnus was the first to look away.

“You really need not concern yourself with the nephilim any longer,” Asmodeus said, almost gently.

Magnus very slowly lifted his head again, his blood running cold. “What did you do,” he asked in a flat, horrified whisper.  
“Nothing,” Asmodeus replied. “I just sent one of my servants to take those sorrowful memories of his so he can move on, just like you wanted.”

Closing his eyes, Magnus turned away. Yes, he had thought, and still did, that being able to forget him and move on would be better for Alec. He had also known it would hurt him. But he hadn’t expected it to hurt this much.

“Magnus.”

Magnus curled his hands into fists.

“Magnus!”  
“What do you want?” Magnus snapped as he spun around.  
“A little bit of appreciation?” Asmodeus asked brusquely. “I could have disposed of him entirely, you know? Instead I sent Ugiron after his memories so you can put all that to rest!”

It was a bit of a surprise to Magnus, if he was being honest. He had been afraid from the very first moment that his father would take his frustration out on Alec one day, so Alec forgetting him was a kindness to both of them. Magnus knew of course that Asmodeus was far from kind, that this was all part of his scheme to break and bend Magnus to his will. But in the end, Alec was all that truly mattered, and at least for the next decades, until he could be sure that Alec had passed away, Magnus had to keep his head down.

So he took a deep breath and looked at his father again.

“If I do as you say, will you leave Alec and those around him in peace?”  
“Your precious nephilim and a handful of Shadowhunters and Downworlders? They don’t mean anything to me anyway. But yes, I will not concern myself with them any longer.”  
“Do I have your word?” Magnus asked, already laden with defeat and cold dread.  
“You have my word,” Asmodeus replied and got up.

Magnus watched him approach, saw that look that could be mistaken for warm and affectionate, if Asmodeus had been capable of those emotions.

“Then let’s discuss the wedding,” Magnus said, his voice sounding unfamiliarly heavy to his own ears.

Asmodeus rested a hand on his son’s shoulder with a proud smile.

* * *

Alec, Izzy, and Jace still went out on routine patrol despite the threat of Asmodeus; there hadn’t been reports of unusual demonic activities to justify a higher alert, but they still had their job to do no matter what loomed ahead. The waiting was driving Alec nuts, so going out on patrol just to have something else to do than staring at screens and reports was the only thing keeping him sane right now. But even that patrol turned out to be boring and uneventful. No demonic activities whatsoever.

Alec felt as if the world was just holding its breath.

And to add insult to injury it started to rain as they were on their way home. First they had been walking through the backstreets of Brooklyn for hours without seeing more than a rat, and now they were being drenched within minutes.

Thoughts of warm showers and hot coffees occupied Alex’s mind, tired as he was from constant lack of sleep, so for a moment he didn’t watch where he was going and collided with another pedestrian. The person, a middle-aged woman, looked him straight in the eyes. Which technically she shouldn’t have been able to, as he was glamoured.

“Alec!”

Alec blinked a few times, feeling slightly disoriented. Izzy was shaking him by the shoulders, and Jace had his blade drawn that was dripping ichor.

“Alec!” Izzy patted his cheek. “Alec, are you okay?”  
“I’m fine!” Alec gently pushed her away. “What is wrong with you?”  
“You kind of fell behind,” Jace said and looked around, shoulders tense. “And then we saw you and that woman locked in a staring contest.”  
“What woman?”

Jace and Izzy both inhaled sharply.

“Alec,” Jace said and stepped closer, looking deeply into his eyes. “You sure you all right? You just had a run-in with some sort of shape-shifting demon.”  
“I’m fine,” Alec said, but a tiny shudder ran down his spine. “But...” He looked at his sister, then his parabatai. “Do you think I need to be in quarantine now?”  
“Nah.” Jace slapped his shoulder. “We keep a sharp eye on you.”

The three of them made their way back to the Institute as fast as they could now, and Alec instantly let Izzy check him for any demonic magic.

“There are a few traces,” she said. “They’re very faint, though. I think whatever she meant to do, she didn’t get around to it because we came back for you.”

Alec nodded with a sigh. Him being out of the picture, even only for a short term, was not something he wanted to deal with right now. He needed to be able to fight.

“Too bad we can’t have Magnus check on that magic,” Jace said, to immediately freeze when Izzy slapped his arm.

Alec lifted both eyebrows and looked back and forth between them.

“Sorry,” Jace muttered, looking at his feet.  
“No talking about him,” Izzy said firmly and tried to smile.  
“About who?” Alec asked, thoroughly puzzled.  
“You know who,” Izzy replied.  
“I don’t,” Alec said, more puzzled than before.

Izzy and Jace exchanged a look.

“You told us not to talk about him,” Jace said cautiously.  
“Then let’s not talk about him,” Izzy said and elbowed him in the ribs.

“I have no idea what you’re going on about.” Alec hopped down from the infirmary bed. “And honestly... I am not in the mood for guessing games right now. So either you spit it out, or let me have a shower.”

There was a moment of tense silence.

“Shower,” Izzy said. “It’s nothing.”

Alec cast both of them a distrustful look, but then he shook his head and left. It was definitely not nothing, but he couldn’t deal with any of that nonsense right now. He was cold and tired and he was constantly on edge, desperately juggling between trying to sleep and being always ready to rise and fight. Mind games were not high on his priority list right now.

* * *

The ‘nothing’ that Izzy and Jace had been acting so weird about came up again two days later, when they visited Maryse who had invited the three of them for dinner.

Maryse welcomed them all with a smile, but then looked puzzled and slightly worried when she closed the door.

“Where is Magnus?”  
“Who?” Alec asked, simultaneously with Izzy who said: “We can’t talk about him.”

Maryse looked back and forth between the two, her eyes widening. “Did you have an argument?”

“What is wrong with all of you?” Alec looked around. “Who are you talking about?”

Maryse looked at Izzy who shook her head, and at Jace who shrugged before shaking his head too. Then her eyes fell back onto Alec who was getting more than angry.

“You’ve had your laugh, now can you stop this nonsense?”

A tense silence hung in the air for a moment.

“Alec,” Izzy said then. “I know you told us not to talk about him, but this is a bit much.”  
“Izzy, I want you to tell me right now what the hell is going on.”

Izzy looked helplessly at Jace who shrugged again.

“Alec...” Maryse swallowed and leaned a little forward, deep lines of worry on her face. “What is going on with you and Magnus?”  
“I have no idea, because I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Alec snapped. This conversation was beginning to truly make him angry. “Or whom, for that matter.”

“Memories,” Izzy suddenly whispered into the silence.  
“What?” Alec huffed out an angry sigh.  
“The demon,” Izzy said hesitantly. “Remember, the other day? When I examined you and found only traces of demonic magic?”  
“Yes...?” Alec felt his spine tingle.  
“She must have taken your memories.”  
The tingling turned into a cold shudder. “Memories of what? This Magnus guy you’re going on about?”

It was Maryse who finally broke the silence.

“Alec... Magnus is the love of your life...”

Alec stared at her and felt as if someone had just hit him with a two-by-four. 

“...what?”

Several looks were exchanged between them, but Alec felt only numb. He was… supposed to be… in love? There was a guy in his life... or should be... and he had no recollection whatsoever? The name didn’t sound familiar, there was no face, not even the trace of a feeling. There was nothing. This was absurd.

“This is the worst prank you ever played on me,” he said flatly. “So just.... just stop.”

“This has to be Asmodeus’ doing,” Jace said. “He took Magnus, now he took Alec’s memories.”  
“And he took my memories about a guy you insist is in my life, but not about himself?” Alec scoffed. “Or the fact that I am going to kill him?”  
“You’re planning on killing Asmodeus?” Maryse asked, visibly shocked. “And what are you talking about... what happened to Alec’s memories?” Her voice was slightly shaky speaking those last words.

It was getting a bit much. Even for a prank. And while pranks like this might be Jace’s style, they weren’t usually Izzy’s, and certainly not his mother’s.

And if it was true, then Asmodeus had robbed him of something more precious than he had been able to imagine, leaving him with nothing but an empty space where his memories should be.

Alec stared at his hands and felt anger rise again, this time for a totally different reason. Asmodeus had stolen his love and his memories... And he would most certainly pay.

“Alec,” Izzy said after a moment. “We know you want to bring Asmodeus down, now probably more than ever. But you still can’t honestly plan on doing this alone? He is-”  
“A powerful greater demon and a prince of hell,” Alec finished for her, tugging at his fingers. “I know. But he has a weakness.”  
“And that is?”  
“I’m not going to risk speaking about it.”

“Come on, Alec.” Jace leaned forward. “I’m pretty sure Asmodeus knows that weakness.”  
“Yes, but he’s not supposed to know that I know.”  
“And how is he supposed to find that out? You might as well tell us.”  
“I won’t.”  
“Why?” Jace leaned forward. “ Alec, if you’re planning on sacrificing yourself then I promise you I come after you and drag your ass back here to kill you again. I’m your parabatai, for god’s sake. I’m supposed to fight beside you and share every danger you face.”  
“Not this.”  
“Spit it out!” Jace slammed his hand onto the table. “Or I swear Izzy and I are going to tie you up somewhere.”

Alec closed his eyes. Maybe Jace was right, but he still admitted it only very reluctantly. “It’s angel blood,” he muttered.

“Angel blood?” Maryse asked after a moment. “You can kill Asmodeus with angel blood?”  
“That’s what the Silent Brothers told me,” Alec said, tugging at the hem of his sleeve with his other hand. “No weapon or wound can kill him, unless the wound is imbued with angel blood. Then he’ll be gone forever.”  
“And where will you get angel blood?” Izzy asked.

Alec didn’t reply. 

“No.” Izzy thrust out her finger at him. “Absolutely not. Don’t even think about it.”  
“Alec, seriously,” Jace hissed through gritted teeth. “Are you out of your mind?”  
“An arrowhead should be enough,” Alec said tensely. “I am quite confident about my aim.”  
“And Asmodeus has never in his life had to deflect an arrow, sure.” Jace shook his head. “Alec, you _are_ out of your mind.”

“Now you know why I didn’t want you to know,” Alec snapped. “Don’t you see? I need to do this, it’s the only way! It’s the only chance I get for taking him out and I have to do this alone!”  
“Yes to the former,” Izzy said. “And ‘ _why do you think that you moron_ ’ to the latter. We’ve always had each other’s back. Alec, what is wrong with you?”

Shaking his head, Alec sighed again. “You don’t get it, do you? It’s not only Asmodeus. If he shows up here, I have to act, and fast. And I will be acting directly against Clave orders, because they need to be involved in the process of sending people to take out greater demons. But I know we don’t have that time. And you know that too. I don’t want you to risk getting excommunicated and de-runed.”

Izzy took a deep breath, but before she could say anything, her mother spoke.

“Let me help.”  
“What?” Alec gave her a puzzled look.  
“Let me help,” Maryse said again, and there was a strange urgency in her voice. “I am already excommunicated, and de-runed. They can’t do that twice, can they?”  
“Mom...”

“No, Alec, listen.” Maryse’s eyes were filling with tears. “Ever since I was forced to leave everything behind, I am adrift. This life, this mundane life, it’s... it’s driving me mad. I have never felt so useless and so without any purpose. But I’m not too old to stand my ground in a fight.”  
“Mother...” Alec tried again.  
“Yes, exactly.” Maryse wiped her fingers across her lower lids. “I am your mother. And I know that for you it’s a suicide mission, and it will be one if you go alone. And I understand why you don’t want your siblings along, but that reason isn’t valid for me. Please, Alec... I am your mother. And the last thing I want is for you to die when I could have done something to prevent it.”

Alec was shaking his head, but let her take his hand. A single tear broke free from her right eye and ran down her cheek.

“Please, Alec, let me do this for you. This does not have to be a suicide mission if it’s the two of us. And I’ll gladly take the place of a scapegoat too if that’s what the Clave needs. Just please... please let me help.”  
“Mom...” Alec closed his fingers around hers. “I can’t let you do this.”  
“Alec.” She shook her head, and another tear joined the first one. “You are young, you have your whole life ahead of you, and I have nothing. I promise, no, Alec, I swear, I will not use this mission as a suicide, but please.... I beg you, if there is angel blood that has to be spilled, then let it be mine. Then you can live your life, and I... at least I won’t be wasting away in this meaningless existence any longer, and I will die a true Shadowhunter death at least. A death with meaning. That’s all I ask for.”

“Mom...” Izzy was in tears as well.  
“Isabelle...” Maryse looked at her daughter. “There was a reason for you to fear the lawsuit back then. You faced de-runing once. I have been through it. And I want that for none of my three children. I promise you that I am not looking for an easy suicide. But if I have to die, then it will be a death with meaning. Can’t you understand that?”  
“I can,” Izzy said and blinked her tears away. “But I don’t want it.”

Maryse took a deep breath and looked at her firstborn son again.

“Alec,” she said and tried to stop her tears. “I know I told you that far too many times, but now, I really need you to take it to heart. Emotions cloud judgement. I learned that it’s not always a bad thing. But in this case? Think.” She squeezed his hand again. “Asmodeus has to die. I can help without risking anything.”  
“Yeah, and I risk losing my mother,” Alec said, gritting his teeth.

Another tear rolled down Maryse’s cheek as she rested a hand against the side of Alec’s face. “Any mother would gladly risk, and give, her own life for that of her children,” she said gently. “But if we stand together, then it doesn’t have to happen.”

Alec closed his eyes and leaned into the touch. Truth to be told, he couldn’t remember if she had ever touched him like that, and the thought that he had to risk losing her now, when they had finally breached some of the abyss that had been gaping between them for so long, was painful. But it was also painfully true that alone, he only had a very, very slim chance of succeeding.

“We can kill Asmodeus together,” Maryse whispered.  
Trying to smile, Alec rested his hand on hers and opened his eyes again. “Life is full of hard choices, hmm?”  
“Some choices are harder to make than others,” his mother replied with a gentle smile.  
“Promise me you won’t be throwing your life away just like that.”  
“I promise,” Maryse said firmly. “And it will be him against two Lightwoods. He won’t know what hit him.”

Alec could only pray that she wouldn’t be proven horribly wrong.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Warning** : This chapter really goes to town on everyone, including minor character deaths.

The suit was of an old-fashioned cut – old-fashioned to Magnus, that is – with a tailcoat and tight trousers that fit into knee high boots. Lace was ruffled under his chin.

He may have looked like a dashing highwayman. If highwaymen looked as if they had been skinned with a blunt knife after being boiled alive for a few days, prior to dressing up.

Yet the choice of wardrobe his father had made was the least of Magnus’ problems right now. He was set to marry a pair of sisters, succubi, no less, daughters of a lieutenant of the Lord of Greed. Asmodeus had been taking the chance of Lilith’s absence to undermine her rule and cement his own, and now sought to further his powers through an alliance with one of the seven Lords of Sin. And his son was the pawn he needed for that particular game.

Magnus knew he shouldn’t care. He would never see Alec again, never touch him again, never hear his voice again. It was only a matter of time – time that passes so much more quickly for immortals – until Alec would be gone, so why was surrendering to his fate so hard? Nothing he could do would change anything.

His father sorted Magnus’ lace with a proud smile one last time before they set off, but Magnus felt smiling beyond him. Allmunoth was waiting for them as Asmodeus and Magnus left their residence, and while he didn’t move a muscle in his face, he gave them both a nod.

Magnus’ heart was racing, and his insides felt as if he had swallowed a bucket of rocks.

Every step towards his fate was heavier than the one before, and he couldn't even say why he didn't just collapse under the weight pressing on his shoulders. He didn't want to do this... but he had no choice.

Every fibre of his being screamed at him to run and hide and not let this happen. But there wasn’t a place where Asmodeus would not find him, not here and not on Earth.

His future brides were waiting for him, smiling and seemingly eager to make their vows, and most certainly eager to consummate their union. Magnus briefly wondered how much free will they had in this business, but no matter if they had been forced or not, he knew they would never be allies to him. And as beautiful as they were, as mind-blowing as sex with them might be, he didn’t want to touch them and he didn’t want them to touch him. He had asked his father last night, and ended up begging him to take the memories of Alec away, but Asmodeus had laughed right into his face.

Having reached the ceremonial hall, Allmunoth stood by his daughters’ side, and Asmodeus next to Magnus. He didn’t know any of the others attending the ceremony apart from these people, and couldn’t say he cared. The woman who was now approaching them with a ritual knife was a stranger to him too, and while he felt he should understand the language of her chants, he didn’t pay enough attention.

His heart was racing, speeding up more and more. The lace around his throat was choking him. Blood was rushing in his ears.

He didn’t want to do this. He couldn't do it. He couldn't. But he had to. The consequences if he refused didn’t bear thinking about.

There was no way out. There would be no dashing handsome saviour who would burst in here, tear him out of this horrible mistake with a searing kiss, and make everything okay again.

Candle light reflected on the blade of the knife, ready to cut into his flesh and draw his blood to seal the union.

Magnus couldn’t breathe.

He watched the ceremonial knife like a small rabbit the face of the cobra. The chanting rang in his ears as if he was standing right inside a giant church bell. The woman took his arm and –

Something inside him snapped. “No.” Magnus tore his hand away. He couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t think, he only knew that he could not bind himself body and soul to these two creatures from hell. “No.”

He spun around and turned to run, and only when he heard his father’s enraged scream did he realize what he had just done.

The flare of magic that hit him threw him through the air like a rag doll. It grabbed him again and slammed him into the ground hard enough to make some of his teeth shatter, and blinding, red-hot pain exploded in his skull. His whole existence was agony, and then suddenly, everything went silent and dark.

The next sensation that reached his mind was something cold and hard pressing against his cheek, and when he finally managed to open his eyes, he only saw roughly hewn flagstones. His whole body screamed in protest as he moved, a dull pain throbbing in every limb, but eventually Magnus was able to push himself up onto his elbows.

Flagstones.

He looked up.

Stone walls.

Then he looked around.

He was in a cell in his father’s dungeon, naked and with one of his ankles shackled to an iron ring in the floor.

And then it all came back to him.

“Oh god... no…”

A hoarse sob forced itself out of his throat, sore and aching from screams he couldn’t remember. He was doomed. And he had doomed everyone he cared about.

As if summoned by his thoughts the door to the cell opened and Asmodeus stepped in, looking down at his son with pure, naked loathing.

“Fa-”

“Silence!”

A blast of magic sent Magnus hurling into the wall at his back.

“You ungrateful piece of worthless vermin!” Asmodeus stepped closer, his hands glowing with magic. “You imbecile! What have you done?!”  
“Father,” Magnus whispered, his heart clenching in terror.  
“You have ridiculed and humiliated me in front of my entire kingdom!”

Another burst of magic clamped around Magnus like a vice, clenching so hard he could feel his ribs beginning to bend and crack.

“You ruined everything!” The vice tightened and Magnus couldn’t breathe. “You could have ruled beside me! All of Edom, not only half of it! I was so close to uniting Edom under my rule and you destroyed everything!”

The vice vanished and Magnus fell to the hard stone floor, gasping for air while wincing in pain.

“We had an accord,” Asmodeus said, his voice ice-cold, colder than Magnus had ever heard it before. “But it seems it is no longer viable.”

Magnus’ heart almost stopped right then and there. “Father, no…”  
“We had an accord,” Asmodeus said again. “But since I obviously cannot rely on your word, then… well, I do not feel compelled to keep mine.”  
Magnus felt tears burn in his eyes. “Father, please… this is my fault. Punish me, do with me what you want, but don’t hurt him…”  
“Oh, I will punish you,” Asmodeus said, his voice as pleasant as you please, and his eyes glowing with deadly fire. “And I hope you will feel sufficiently punished when you listen to your mortal friends begging for mercy while I explain to them exactly why this is happening to them. Each and every one of them will die a torturous death knowing that it was your doing.”  
“Father…” Magnus shook his head. “Father, please…”

Asmodeus exhaled heavily through his nose.

“You have only yourself to blame,” he said, and turned away. The door fell shut behind him and vanished into the stone wall.

Magnus stared at the wall for another moment before his chin fell to his chest, and he curled up on the hard stone floor, his desperate sobs the only sound to disturb the cold, silent darkness.

* * *

In the days after the harrowing discovery, Alec was mostly fine. He managed to focus on his job and on his tasks. But then, out of the blue, he would remember why he was so set on killing Asmodeus, remembered what the demon had taken without even leaving a trace. Erased it to the point that Alec didn’t even know what was gone. That there wasn’t even a shadow of a memory left enraged Alec only further. He just knew, and even that only from hearsay, that there had been something, or rather someone, incredibly precious in his life, and now he couldn’t even remember what it had been.

And Asmodeus would pay for it.

He had spoken to his mother twice more during that time, and she had assured him she was ready to be at his side any given moment. And together, they would bring Asmodeus down.

Alec knew that she needed a blade at least, as a stele wouldn’t be of any use since she didn’t have runes anymore. But she had explicitly told him not to try and smuggle one out of the Institute so nothing could be traced back to him. He had agreed, but it was worrying him nonetheless.

The anger and the waiting were driving him mad.

Until finally, at nightfall on the fourth day after that evening in his mother’s apartment, the alarm in the Ops-centre went off.

Alec, Jace and Izzy all came running from different directions but met right in front of the large screen, staring at the large red dot that had appeared in Prospect Park.

Izzy checked the signature. “Greater demon.”  
“We need to inform the Clave,” Alec said. “Jace, put teams together. Izzy, get in touch with Idris. I go recon. Do not engage.”

Of course both Jace and Izzy knew that Alec was not on recon mission, but no one else suspected anything when Alec equipped himself with his bow and quiver, and a seraph blade. As soon as he stepped outside he took his phone and called his mother.

“He’s here.”  
_“Good.”_ He could hear her move. _“Where?”_  
“The energy signature points to Prospect Park.”  
_“I’m on my way.”_

Alec slipped the phone back into his pocket and grabbed his stele. He activated the speed and stamina rune, and then he ran.

* * *

When Alec reached Prospect Park it was already dark, but there was no obvious sign of a greater demon. Alec wondered if there should be a flaming pentagram or the remnants of one, or a portal, or if he was too late.

His shoulders heaving with heavy breaths he looked around, one arrow nocked, and he slowly walked past the boathouse, his eyes darting back and forth. He stopped for a moment before crossing Binnen Bridge, but then he heard footsteps and went down into a crouch.

The person coming into view was not a demon however, but a woman dressed in black with a long black braid hanging down her back.

Alec got up again with a huff of relief. “Mother.”  
“Alec.” She briefly smiled at him. “Have you seen anything?”  
“Not yet.”

He looked at her again, and couldn’t suppress a smile. The tight black jeans and black leather vest, together with low-heeled boots and the braid, and the way she moved, left no room for doubt that he was looking at a warrior. He knew his mother had had a reputation before she had married, and now he could see why. She must have been formidable in battle. She most likely still was.

But as they neared another street lamp Alec stopped again to stare at her. “Mother…?”  
Maryse looked back at him, and followed his eyes. “Yes?”  
“Where did you…?” Alec gestured at the fresh yet unmistakable marks on her arms.  
“There are a few weapon stashes that don’t need a stele to access,” she said after a moment’s hesitation. “Their locations are well guarded, but I know of one. And I am still nephilim, so why shouldn’t I make use of it? It’s just a few combat runes.”  
“I guess I don’t really want to know more,” he said, and looked around again for a moment.

They exchanged a small smile, but then simultaneously turned back towards the path in silent focus. It was when they were about to step free from the trees that they saw it: a faint, red column of light, right there in the middle of the open grass in front of them.

Going into a crouch they advanced more cautiously now, and stopped altogether when they could see the dark outline of a male figure against the red glow. Maryse took her stele and activated a few runes, and then gestured at Alec that she would circle around the open area to come from the other side. Alec nodded, and slowly crept forward a little further after activating his own runes.

From what he had read he knew, and he could only hope it was true, that a demon travelling to earth without being summoned was weakened from the passage, so they had to attack as fast as possible. Alec took his arrow and gritting his teeth, sliced into his forearm, just deep enough to draw blood. He coated the arrowhead and half the shaft in blood, quickly activated his healing rune and nocked the arrow again before he crept a few more steps forward.

The figure still hadn’t moved.

Alec approached slowly, one step at a time, and he stopped after each step to observe the dark and silent figure. It just stood there. Maybe the journey really had taken its toll.

Alec took a deep breath and got up, and pulled the string. A few more steps, and he was close enough to get a clear shot at the demon’s heart.

The demon’s head flew up the moment Alec let the arrow fly. And Alec didn’t even have the time to curse before Asmodeus flung up one arm at him. The arrow went up in flames mid-air, and the wave of magic that had evaporated it hit Alec straight in the chest.

He was thrown backward a good bit and landed hard on his back, his hand losing the grip on his bow. He couldn’t even make a sound of pain because he had the wind knocked completely out of him.

“Really, Shadowhunter?” The derision in that voice was making Alec’s blood boil and he managed to squeeze some air into his lungs. “An arrow?”

Asmodeus was striding towards him, and despite the cane he didn’t seem feeble or weakened at all. Or maybe he was weakened by the passage, but still so powerful that the arrow he had shot at Asmodeus would be his very last.

But suddenly Asmodeus stopped dead with a flinch, turned his head, and stared at the small throwing blade sticking out of his right arm. He looked up into the direction the knife had come from, and another one hit him in the shoulder.

Alec was on his feet again, but had to discover that his bow was broken. Flung with the force of Asmodeus magic it had hit a tree, and now one of the arms had a fracture that rendered the bow completely useless. Alec pulled his blade instead.

The throwing knifes seemed to only mildly inconvenience the demon, and he grinned at Alec as he removed them by disintegrating them without any visible effort. The wounds were sizzling, but despite what must have been his mother's blood, neither wound was severe enough to do any real damage. But suddenly a dark shadow shot out of the undergrowth beside him. Maryse took a swing that Asmodeus didn’t manage to block, but even that bleeding wound didn’t seem to hamper him.

“I don’t have time for this nonsense,” he said and his hands glowed in bright, orange light. He thrust out his hands and Maryse dropped her blade with a scream.

Alec set off in a sprint, but everything happened too fast. Asmodeus grabbed Maryse and her blade in his magic and pulled her close with her back to his chest, to use her as a shield. Maryse’s own sword pointed at her throat now, and Alec stopped dead in his tracks.

“I really don’t have time,” Asmodeus said, the grin on his face the most evil Alec had ever seen. “It was amusing, but I have to be on my way.”

“Alec!” Maryse shouted. “Do it!”

It took Alec a moment to register what she meant. But he couldn’t. He couldn’t do it. Asmodeus clearly didn’t know what she was talking about, but even though Alec knew what he had to do, he could do no more than approach cautiously, step by step. Asmodeus was watching him, but didn't make a move to stop him, feeling safe behind the shield of Maryse's body.

“Let her go!” Alec said, close enough now to see the sweat on his mother's face. “You want me! You already took my love, and my memories, now come and take my life too!”

“Oh.” Asmodeus tilted his head, completely ignoring Maryse struggling in his grasp. “That is you? Well, well… You are saving me a lot of trouble, angel boy.”  
“Alec,” Maryse tried again, in a groan. Blood was already trickling down her throat where the blade had bitten into her skin. “Alec… now...”

Asmodeus looked at Alec, at Maryse, and back at Alec again. And with a sweet, evil smile, he cut her throat.

“MOM!”

Alec was petrified with shock and horror. He watched in helpless stupor as her head just dropped forward, and she went limp in Asmodeus arms within seconds.

And the horror gave way to an all-consuming, white-hot fury.

Alec charged with a scream, blade thrust out, and buried his blade into his mother’s body, running her right through and driving the blade deeply into Asmodeus’ chest.

For a moment, time stood still. Asmodeus didn’t move, Alec didn’t move either, but then slowly, very slowly, the mocking smile on Asmodeus’ face began to fade. His eyes widened and he gasped, spluttered, and staggered back. With another furious growl Alec pulled the blade out, and drove it home again. And again.

Asmodeus’ face began to glow. He opened his mouth, and something almost like a whimper escaped him, then a thin whine that slowly grew in volume and intensity until it was a scream, a scream so ear-shattering that Alec stumbled backward to press his hands over his ears.

The demon’s skin began to crack, and bright, orange fire licked out of those cracks, illuminating the blackening skin in between. The light continued to grow in intensity until Alec had to look away.

And then everything went up in flames.

* * *

“Alec…”

The voice was the first thing that reached his mind as Alec awoke to a world of pain.

“Alec, please, hold on…”

Alec tried to open his eyes, but only one of them obeyed him. A face swam into view, but he was too exhausted to keep that eye open long enough to recognize the person.

“Alec…”

He recognised the voice.

“Izzy...” It wasn’t audible, not even to him.

“Alec, please hold on. You’ve been really badly burned. We’re getting a warlock here.”

“Alec.” That was Jace. “Don’t try to move, okay? You were too close to the blast when Asmodeus blew up. The iratze can only do so much. Just... hold on, okay?”

“Mom...” He managed to somehow get that word past his lips with enough force that it was audible.

But the silence of his siblings told him that they already knew. Asmodeus had killed their mother.

“I couldn’t...”  
Izzy’s voice was trembling. “Alec.” Something touched his cheek. “It wasn’t your fault. You battled a greater demon, and you won.”  
“She died a true Shadowhunter,” Jace said in a low voice. “And we knew that was what she wanted.”  
“But...” Alec couldn’t think, his mind empty and muddled by pain.  
“Alec, no.” Alec could feel Jace take his hand. “It’s a miracle you are still alive after a greater demon just blew up in your face.”  
“Alec.” That was Izzy again. “How many Shadowhunters have killed greater demons? How many have died trying?” She was clearly fighting her tears. “You know that she wanted you to live. And you live. Now honour her sacrifice, and live well.”

“Spoken like a true Shadowhunter, Izzy,” Jace said, his voice holding the trace of a smile.

Alec wanted to say something, to offer some comfort, to say how sorry he was that he hadn’t been able to save her, but it was all too much. The pain had settled into his very bones, and he had never been so tired before.

Drifting in and out of painful consciousness Alec could hear their voices, but could no longer make out what they said. He could hear another voice join them, and suddenly he was embraced by a calming and soothing warmth. The pain finally abated, and Alec was gently tugged into oblivion again.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I made an OC just for the sole purpose of being able to insult Lorenzo in Scottish. [This](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/98ce36_0804cd69add242b1b22169c4d3dc75b0~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_1057,h_706,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/98ce36_0804cd69add242b1b22169c4d3dc75b0~mv2.jpg) is how I imagine her.

Magnus had no idea how long he had been lying curled up on the cold, hard stone floor, but at one point he was too wrung out to even cry anymore. There was one thought filling his entire consciousness: He had condemned all his friends to a horrible, agonizingly slow and painful death.

And there was nothing, absolutely nothing he could do about it. Asmodeus would never give him another chance, and he would most likely spend the rest of his existence here in his dungeon, or maybe, if he was lucky, his father would feed him to Allmunoth and his spawn at one point.

But not before he had tortured everyone Magnus cared about to death in front of his eyes. Magnus dropped his head with a hoarse, dry sob.

He froze when he heard a sound, the scraping of wood on stone. The door appeared again, and the red flickering light of demonic magic began illuminating a part of the room. Magnus blinked a few times, his eyes hurting after he had been stuck in absolute darkness for so long.

It wasn’t his father however who entered the cell but two people, and after a moment, he was able to see them more clearly and recognised them as female. He was looking at his two would-have-been brides.

“There you are,” one of them said.  
“We came to take what is ours,” the other added.

Magnus just stared at them. Just another bit of torture he was absolutely helpless to prevent. Why did he even care anymore?

“You have been promised to us,” the first one continued and stepped closer. “And we will claim you now.”

The cold dread in his stomach turned into a dull ache that spread in his body as she stepped closer. But before she reached him her eyes widened and her mouth fell open, and she stared at Magnus in sheer disbelief. And Magnus realised at that moment that the red glow that was slowly enveloping him wasn’t her doing. The ache in his limbs got worse, and he groaned in pain.

Flames spouted out of the ground around him, enveloping and encircling him, as if he wasn’t trapped by a shackle already. He had no idea what was happening, but to judge by the expression of the succubus looking back at him, neither had she. He had another moment of cold terror to wonder what was happening to him before the flames consumed him.

His howl of agony echoed in the emptiness of the cell, to be cut off very abruptly and very finally.

And the two succubi screamed in frustration, staring at the empty floor, the empty shackle, and the lines of the burning pentagram that now stopped glowing and slowly vanished into the flagstones.

* * *

The pain was worse than ever before, and filled his whole being. And then suddenly Magnus felt the ground under him again, he saw the fires that had been consuming him die down, but still the agony remained. The only thing that registered in his mind was the fact that the floor under him was no longer made of flagstones, and he managed to pull a bit of magic together to battle the pain. Only then was he able to look around.

He was indeed not in his cell anymore. The floor was wood, and there was furniture... shelves and a table... it all looked so confusingly familiar...

It hit him like another blow of his father’s magic.

This was his study, in his apartment in Brooklyn.

Which explained the agony he was still in, but it didn’t explain how he had gotten there. He managed to prop himself onto his elbows, and now he could see the lines of a pentagram drawn around him.

He had been summoned... like the demon spawn that he was.

“Magnus...”

He flinched and dropped his head again. He knew that voice. Another voice he had believed he would never hear again. And to be honest, he almost wished he wouldn’t hear it now.

Because the fact that Catarina now saw him like this threatened to break his heart completely.

“Magnus...” Catarina’s voice was flat with horror. “Great god... what have they done to you...”

“Cat, are you sure this is really Magnus?”

He knew that voice as well, but couldn’t put a name to it. Not that it mattered. Even with all he had just been through, he only wished he was back in the dungeon, had never left his cell so Catarina would never have had to see him like this.

A pair of legs appeared in his view, and the person went down in a crouch before him. Magnus looked up despite himself, and into Catarina’s face that was wet with tears.

“It is Magnus,” she whispered. “No one has eyes like him.”

“Then let’s not waste anymore time.”

Catarina nodded and wiped a hand across her face, and then reached out to brush the lines of charcoal dust away, breaking the seal of the pentagram.

“Alec told us about the pain,” Catarina said softly. “Can you walk?”  
“Cat...” He managed to say, his voice close to breaking. “Why did you do this?”  
“To save you.” She held out one hand. “What do you think?”  
“You can’t...”  
“I can, and I will. Come on. It’s not going to be easy, but we can fix this, Magnus. I hate to hurt you any more, but we can fix this.”

A thin flicker of hope arose in Magnus’ chest. Was Catarina really able to fix this? Could he really come back?

But then he remembered his father.

“Cat... no...” The flicker of hope had given way to ice-cold fear again; he pushed himself up and was able to sit on his knees. “You have to send me back. You have to send me back!”  
“Magnus...”  
“No! My father will-”  
“Asmodeus is dead.” Catarina looked into his eyes.  
“No... Cat, you know that a greater demon cannot be killed.” He stared up at her, horrified by the thought of what Asmodeus might do to her. “Send me back,” he begged. “Please, Catarina, you have to send me back!”  
“Not happening,” Catarina replied. There was a faint, strange smile on her face. “Alec killed him. He found a way to end him, once and for all. Asmodeus isn’t back in Edom, he is dead. He will never lay a hand on you again.”

For a moment, Magnus was unable to process her words. Alec had killed him?

“Dead? But that’s... impossible...”  
Catarina’s smile widened a little. “That seems to be a word which doesn’t exist in the vocabulary of Alec Lightwood.”

It couldn’t be true. It was too good to be true. The flicker of hope was back, but Magnus was still struggling to truly believe what he had just heard. But then, it would make sense that the two succubi had been able to enter his father’s dungeon if his magic was no longer around to seal it...

“He’s... gone?”  
“He is gone,” Catarina said firmly. “You’re free, Magnus.”

Free...

The word had already lost its meaning to him. 

But now...

Free...? Was he really free?

“How is this possible...” He felt tears burn in his eyes, and he was losing his grip on his magic. The pain made him wince and he could see Catarina reach out to him.  
“I don’t know,” she said, offering him a hand. “I don’t know how Alec did it. But he said not getting you back home is not an option.”  
“Alexander...” Alec had killed Asmodeus. A greater demon... “Is he all right?”

Catarina hesitated for a moment, and Magnus’ heart was gripped by panic.

“He lives,” she said then. “He was injured, but he’ll be fine. We’ll go and check on him once all this is over.”

Magnus could still hardly grasp it. He was free, Asmodeus was gone forever, and he would soon be able to see Alec again, talk to him, and even touch him, if Catarina was right.

“Come on,” she said to him, still holding out her hand. “The sooner we get this started, the sooner you’ll be free of the pain.”

Magnus reached out then, hesitantly and with a trembling hand. Catarina seemed unperturbed by his flayed skin and his claws, and closed her fingers firmly around his when Magnus touched her hand. She remained mindful of the claws as he pulled him onto his feet, but didn’t let go while leading him to the guest bathroom.

The salty and metallic smell that invaded his nostrils now made Magnus balk, and a shudder was running down his spine as he stared at the bathtub filled with blood. 

“Don’t worry, we didn’t have to sacrifice anyone,” Catarina said calmingly. “Raphael and Simon were more than eager to help out. They want you back as much as everyone else.”

Magnus hesitated for another moment, but taking a literal blood bath seemed preferable to the pain that was getting harder and harder to keep in check with every passing minute. He still couldn’t believe that Catarina would really be able to undo what Asmodeus had done to him. But she was Catarina Loss, the best healer he had ever known. And he trusted her, blindly and absolutely.

The other warlock entered the bathroom as well, and now Magnus finally recognised her as Annie McIntosh, a specialist in healing magic, just like Catarina.

“Let’s get this over with,” she said, in that adorable Scottish accent of hers, and uncorked a small vial.  
“Annie,” Magnus said. “I...”  
“Later.” She managed a smile, obviously a little more affected by his hideous appearance but determined not to let that stop her from doing her job. “We gotta fix this first. You’ve been like this fucking long enough.”

She poured the contents of the vial into the blood that instantly began to steam.

“In you go,” Catarina said. “Now. Submerge completely as fast as possible.”

Magnus hesitated for another heartbeat before he stepped into the tub. He let himself slide into the blood, but needed all his strength to do so because the liquid felt as if it was boiling acid. But the moment his face was covered he felt a surge of magic pinning down to the bottom of the tub. 

He was consumed by a pain more terrible than anything he had ever felt before. He had thought being summoned was agony, but it was nothing against what he was experiencing now. And despite his trust in Catarina, his instincts made him struggle. He tried to fight it. He needed air. But he couldn’t even scream, his mouth filling with blood as soon as he parted his lips.

But then a hand was at the back of his neck and dragged him upright. And the pain vanished as suddenly as it had come.

Magnus gasped for air and coughed and heaved, spitting blood that was still burning his throat and in his eyes, and Catarina’s hand on his back was the only thing keeping him upright. He was still coughing and heaving when he felt the shower being turned on, and the warm water raining down on him was like a cool and soothing blessing. The plug of the tub had been pulled a while ago and it was empty now, only smears of blood remaining that the shower slowly washed away.

Magnus was finally able to stop coughing and heaving, and with great effort he managed to look up at Catarina who was watching him with a smile, and tears in her eyes.

“Welcome back,” she said softly.

It took Magnus a moment to process those words, and then, hesitantly and filled with fear and apprehension, he slowly looked down at himself.

He stared at his hands, his eyes widening almost painfully. He slapped those to his face, felt his lips, his cheeks, and his nose, before staring at his hands again. His hands, human hands, with nails instead of claws. And most importantly, the pain his father had cursed him with was gone, completely and without a trace.

And he helplessly burst into tears. Catarina’s hand remained in place, and her other was caressing the back of his neck in an attempt to calm him. But Magnus needed a while to get himself under control again, and he kept staring at his hands in disbelief, even after he had gotten over the initial shock.

“Come on,” Catarina said, her voice still soft.

She and Annie helped Magnus out of the tub, and Catarina wrapped him into a towel before turning him towards the mirror.

Magnus needed a moment to clear his eyes before he could see his reflection, and he had to keep wiping his eyes. He could hardly fathom it, but there it was, his face, looking back at him from the mirror. He had neither eyebrows nor hair, but that didn’t matter, because he wouldn’t even need magic to fix that.

“Did we get it right?” Catarina asked with a smile, bringing her cheek next to his.  
“You know you did,” Magnus whispered. “Cat, I... I don’t know how...”  
“I did nothing you wouldn’t have done for me,” she said and kissed his cheek. “And now, I think, you should put on some clothes, and I’ll make you a cup of tea.”

Magnus let her steer him away from the mirror and towards the bedroom. They passed Annie on their way who was helping herself to a drink from Magnus’ stock. She smiled at him and saluted him with her glass.

“Annie... I don’t know how to thank you,” he said.  
She shook her head. “What she said.”  
“Wait,” Magnus said then, a sudden thought hitting his mind. “Did Lorenzo sanction the summoning of a demon?”  
“Lorenzo can kiss my ass,” Annie replied and took a sip of her drink. “That old bawbag let a greater demon and her spawn get on with their merry ways just to fucking spite you. I’m not going to listen to a roaster who acts like a jealous toddler throwing a tantrum.”

She took a sip of her whiskey and Magnus discovered that his opinion about her language had suddenly changed from ‘rude’ to ‘adorable’. And after what she had done for him now, he wondered why she wasn’t a member of his circle of close friends. Time to amend that. 

“I think,” Annie went on with a smug smile, “that there’s going to be another election for a new high warlock in the near future. Personally I’m sure as fuck not going to fawn on a bampot who’s talking out of his arse all the fucking time.”  
“I’m sure you’re qualified for the job,” Magnus replied with a smirk.  
“You know I’m fucking not,” Annie gave back and knocked back her drink. “And as much as I like looking at you,” she reached for the bottle, “I think you better put some clothes on.”

Magnus managed a smile and headed towards the bedroom. His legs were still a little weak, and his arms too, his fingers trembling as he opened the door of his wardrobe. And when he finally looked at himself again, dressed in black jeans and a dark red shirt, his vision blurred again.

He fought his tears and rolled his shoulders, but it took him a moment to get himself together again. A part of him still couldn’t believe this was really happening, afraid he would wake up any moment to find his father laughing at him. Mind games like this, making Magnus believe he was free only to take it away again, were definitely something his father would do. But making up something like this, something so complex, with warlocks and a complicated ritual, definitely was not. 

Asmodeus was dead. He kept telling himself that over and over again. Asmodeus was dead, and would never be able to hurt him again. And now that Catarina had undone what his father had done to Magnus, all that remained were memories. Horrible memories, granted, memories that would without a trace of doubt cause him nightmares for a long time to come.

But Magnus had dealt with nightmares before. Now, it was over. He was free.

Blinking back his tears Magnus snapped his fingers to summon his magic, and while he was still drained from the passage and the restoration ritual, his magic did his bidding with the ease he remembered. He ran his hands over his bare head once, and a second time to style the freshly grown hair, then did the same with his eyebrows. His rings and his favourite ear cuff were still in Edom, and since Magnus had no intention to leave something so important behind to make tracking him any easier, he concentrated, gathered his magic, and conjured them up. It wasn’t easy, but he didn’t exhaust himself with it either.

Then he cast another look at himself.

He wiped the back of his hand across his eyes and nodded, and spent another few moments to fix the last details: some eyeliner, nail polish, and a trace of glitter.

He smiled at himself and blinked the moisture out of his eyes, and left the bedroom again.

Magnus Bane was back.

“Looking good,” Annie said, lounging in his couch with a whiskey tumbler. “Drink?”  
Magnus fell down beside her and took the offered tumbler. “Thank you,” he said and poured the whole shot down his throat in one go. It was an entirely different burn, a pleasant warmth, and he handed her the glass back. “And I mean for everything.”  
“You would’ve moved heaven and hell if that had happened to any of us,” she replied simply. “And if we warlocks don’t watch out for each other, then who will? Even a petty wee nyaff like Lorenzo won’t fucking change that.” She took a sip. “Absolute weapon, that guy.”

Catarina sat down on his other side and offered him a mug. Magnus took it with a smile and inhaled the fragrance of Earl Grey. Such a simple pleasure, the smell of good tea. Just one of so many he had believed he would never experience again.

They sipped their drinks in silence, Annie her whiskey and Magnus and Catarina their tea.

Magnus let his eyes roam across the room. It still felt unreal. But here he was, on his couch, sipping tea with his best friend, and he would never set foot in Edom again. 

He was home. He was free. 

It would take him some time to get used to that idea; whenever he closed his eyes he could still see the red and orange hues of Edom, and the world when he opened his eyes was almost grotesquely colourful. But Edom was nothing more but a painful memory now.

Eventually, Catarina looked at Magnus and searched his eyes. “Do you need to talk about it?”  
Magnus lowered his cup and sighed. “I do,” he said. “But not yet.”  
She closed her hand around his shoulder. “You know I’m here for you whenever you need me.”  
“I know,” he said with a warm smile, and rested his free hand atop of hers. “Now more than ever.”

They leaned in towards each other and touched their foreheads together for a moment. Then Magnus leaned back with a smile and emptied his cup.

“You ready?” Catarina asked and got up.  
“Ready?” Magnus followed her lead. “For what?”  
“A little portalling,” she replied with a smile. “I think there’s someone who’s looking forward to see you again.”

Magnus swallowed drily, his heart jumping into his throat.

“I didn’t think I’d ever see him again,” he whispered, trying to keep his voice even.  
“Today is full of surprises,” Catarina replied and summoned a portal. “After you.”

“I finish cleaning the bathroom and see myself out,” Annie said. “Though I might treat myself to another wee drink.”  
“Whatever you want.” Magnus met her eyes with a warm smile. “I’m forever in your debt, and no amount of whiskey can ever change that.”  
“Nonsense,” she said, down-to-earth as ever. “Now off you go, lad, and enjoy that heartfelt reunion. You got enough condoms?”

Magnus tilted his head and cocked one eyebrow.

“Just asking.” She made a shooing motion, and Magnus rolled his shoulders and stepped into the portal.

The sight of the Institute caused Magnus another surge of emotions, and he needed a moment before he was able to walk again. His knees were weaker than before and his hands were shaking, and he didn’t even realise that Catarina was on the phone before she stepped beside him again.

“Jace will be here in a moment.”

Magnus would never have been able to imagine he would be so happy to see Jace, and they embraced for a long time before they let go again.

“Welcome back,” Jace said and slapped his shoulder. “Come on in.”  
“How is Alec?” Magnus asked as they entered the Institute.  
“Not too well,” Jace said with a worried frown. “But with a little warlock healing magic, he’ll be fine. He’s not in danger of dying, you know? But he’s been really badly burned. Catarina fixed the worst last night, but we had to clear the place quickly because the mundanes had seen the explosion and everyone was screaming bombs and terror.”

Magnus nodded, forcing his breathing to remain slow.

To judge by the noise and the amount of Shadowhunters milling about, the Institute was still on red alert after Asmodeus, and as soon as they had reached the Ops-center someone called Jace’s name and hurried over.

“Jace, I need you to look at this!”  
Jace turned towards Magnus. “One second. I’ll be right back.”

Magnus knew his way to the infirmary well enough however, and his heart was racing so fast he was almost out of breath from the sheer force of it when he entered the infirmary room. And it almost stopped when he laid eyes on Alec again.

Jace hadn’t exaggerated; Alec really had been badly burned, especially his face. He was hooked up to an IV and unconscious, clearly drugged to the eyeballs with sedatives and painkillers. But that would make the healing a lot easier if he didn’t feel so much of it. Healing wounds as deep as those was painful, and Magnus was glad he didn’t have to cause him any more pain than he was already in. 

He yearned to touch him, to embrace him, to feel his heartbeat against his skin after nestling his head into the crook of Alec’s neck, but it had to wait. 

Alec didn’t move while the two warlocks did their job, the only sound he made a few soft moans when Catarina restored the damaged eye.

Once they were done Catarina removed the IV since he didn’t need it anymore, and Magnus pulled a chair up to the bed and sat down, taking one of Alec’s hands while he waited for him to wake up. His heart was racing again, and his stomach was glowing, and the sight of that beloved face made his vision blur, over and over again.

Aided by warlock magic the drugs would wear off quickly, and the sounds of the chaos outside didn’t even properly register in Magnus’ mind as he sat there listening to Alec’s breathing. But eventually Alec’s head dropped to the side and his eyelids fluttered. Magnus calmed his breathing, and increased the pressure of his fingers around Alec’s hand.

Alec’s eyes were still clouded, the drugs clearly not completely out of his system yet, and he gave Magnus a very tired, but also very puzzled look.

“Hey,” Magnus said softly, running his thumb across the back of Alec’s hand. He was fighting his tears again.

Alec just frowned at him.

“Alexander,” Magnus said, and leaned a little closer. “How are you feeling?”  
The frown didn’t vanish. “I’m fine,” Alec muttered and withdrew his hand. “I guess you’re the warlock who fixed me?”

Magnus was frozen in confusion for a moment, and needed to sort his thoughts before he could answer. “Yes...?”  
“Thanks,” Alec said and looked at the ceiling again. “My sister Isabelle will sort your reimbursement.”

Staring at him with his mouth hanging open, Magnus had no idea what to say. And then a horrible realisation rose up in him. He had managed to completely forget about Ugiron, and what his father had sent her to do. And a part of his heart crumbled to ash at that very moment.

Someone stepped into the doorway. “Oh no...”

Magnus slowly turned his head to look at Izzy who looked at him with her lips pressed together.

“Magnus,” she said then, hesitantly and slowly. “We have to talk.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bawbag - ballsack/scrotum  
> roaster - someone who is making a complete cunt out of themselves  
> nyaff - stupid, insignificant, irritating person  
> bampot - idiot, unhinged person  
> absolute weapon - a disgusting arsehole
> 
>  
> 
> [source](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Appendix:Glossary_of_Scottish_slang_and_jargon)


	9. Chapter 9

Magnus was sitting slumped over in a chair at the table in the conference room, his hands clutching a mug of coffee. Catarina was sitting next to him, and Izzy and Jace on the other side of the table, all three of them looking at Magnus with sorrowful eyes.

Not only had he lost Alec, but the news about Clary and Maryse had shocked him to the core. He looked utterly and completely broken.

“I knew,” Magnus said finally, the coffee long gone cold. “I knew my father had sent one of his servants here to take his memories. But she never came back, and I thought... I didn’t even know if I should hope or fear that she hadn’t been able to finish the job.”

“Magnus,” Izzy said softly after a moment.  
Magnus looked up at her.  
“I don’t know how much comfort that is right now but...” She gave him a small smile. “He fell in love with you once. You are his one person. It will happen again.”  
“Maybe,” Magnus replied, trying to dredge up a smile as well.  
“Not maybe.” Izzy said firmly. “He fell for you despite everything. Now? He’s so much more confident, and so much more comfortable with himself. He’s not going to waste much time being in denial.”

Huffing out a soft, sad chuckle, Magnus shook his head. He stared into his coffee and closed his eyes.

“Even if it happens... there’s so much that’s lost now,” he whispered. “Our first kiss, our first date, all those evenings in the Hunter’s Moon... Hong Kong, Bucharest... it’s all gone.”  
“You can make new memories,” Catarina said gently. “They can’t replace the ones you lost, but they will be just as precious.”  
Magnus looked at her, shaking his head. “It’s not the same.”  
“I know.” She touched his hand. “God... Magnus, I’m so, so sorry...”

Magnus could only shrug. “It feels like... only hours ago the fact that Alec’s memories were gone was the only thing giving me any kind of comfort...” He swallowed. “And now... now it’s all...” He broke off and covered his eyes with his hand.

Suddenly Izzy gasped, and everyone looked up at her, and then into the direction she was looking.

“Alec, what the hell?” She got up and met him on his way towards the table. “What are you doing up?”  
“Relax, Izzy.” He slowly walked towards the table. “I’m fine.”  
“No, you’re bloody not.”  
“I’m just tired,” Alec said and sat down next to Jace. If he had chosen to sit as far away from Magnus as possible or done it subconsciously wasn’t clear. “See? I’m sitting down. Not doing anything. You know how much I hate lying in bed.”  
“And you heard me call Magnus by his name,” Izzy said, crossing her arms while Alec avoided her eyes.

Jace took a deep breath. “You need a coffee, buddy. Anyone else want one?” He got up and without waiting for an answer, began to gather the mugs.  
“I help you carry,” Catarina said and did just that.

After a moment, Izzy got up as well. “I leave you to it.”

That left Alec and Magnus alone at the table, in awkward, uncomfortable silence. Magnus stared at his hands and Alec straight ahead while tugging at his fingers.

“This is weird,” Alec said eventually.  
Magnus huffed out a mirthless chuckle.  
“So... uh... a warlock, huh?”  
“Yeah,” Magnus replied and looked up.

Alec shrugged with a faint, lopsided smile that vanished as he began to speak again. “I was... I still can’t believe it. When they told me that my memories were gone and... what... I was so... furious. I still am. It’s just... I don’t know what to do now. I know I should feel something but... there’s just... nothing.”  
“Nothing?” Magnus swallowed drily, his eyes burning. “You feel nothing when you look at me?”

Licking his lips, Alec shrugged again. Magnus lowered his eyes again and stared at his mug. 

“How...” Alec pressed his lips together and rolled the hem of his sleeve between two fingers of the other hand. “How long have we been... uh....”  
“Together?” Magnus sighed. “A few months.”

Alec fidgeted in his chair and eventually, he leaned forward and rested his elbows on the table, then looked at Magnus again. “Look,” he began hesitantly. “I don’t... I really don’t know what to do about this.”  
Magnus looked up at him. “There’s nothing you can do. It’s not your fault.”  
“I know.” Alec dug the fingers of one hand into his hair. “But I... I just want to fix this!” He dropped the hand again with a huff of frustration.  
“There’s nothing to fix, Alec,” Magnus said heavily.  
“It’s just not bloody fair!” Alec curled his hands into fists. “They told me you’re the love of my life, and you should mean the world to me, but I look at you, and you...” He broke off with a helpless grunt.  
“Mean nothing,” Magnus finished for him in a dull voice and looked at the table again. 

Alec sighed and pressed his hands against the table top.

“Well,” Alec said slowly after a moment.  
Lifting one eyebrow Magnus looked up at him.  
“You patched me up,” Alec said with a one-sided shrug. “So, I’m grateful of course.”  
Magnus shrugged too, a tiny twitch of his shoulders.  
“And...” Alec cleared his throat and looked down, his eyes darting back and forth. “I kind of...” He took a deep breath and looked up with a bashful little smile. “I like your hair.”  
“I...” Magnus cleared his throat and attempted a smile as well with little to no success. “Thank you.”

“Look,” Alec began after another long moment of awkward silence. “I know this isn’t... I can’t pretend that nothing happened, and I don’t want to, and you don’t want that either. I just...” A heavy sigh heaved his shoulders. “This... this was important. It meant everything, didn’t it?”  
Magnus licked his lips and exhaled softly. “You once told me that I was the best thing that ever happened to you,” he said, in a slightly trembling voice.  
Alec closed his eyes for a moment. “And... and you want that back, don’t you?”  
“Of course I do,” Magnus replied, blinking furiously. “But you can’t force this, Alexander.”

They stared at each other for a painful moment.

“Maybe...” Alec began hesitantly, in a very small voice. “I don’t know. Maybe we could... try?”

Magnus closed his eyes and shook his head. When he opened them again however he didn’t look at Alec but at his mug.

“I don’t know what to do.” Alec’s voice was strained. “Tell me what I can do.”  
“Nothing,” Magnus said and looked up again. “You can’t force yourself to feel something for someone.”  
“I know,” Alec replied with an angry sigh. “But I... I mean we could go out for a drink, but that... it would still be... I mean you know me, and you remember everything, and I remember nothing and I know nothing about you...” He slammed his hand down. “Fuck!”

Alec buried his face in his hands with a groan, and Magnus crossed his arms so tightly that it looked as if he was hugging himself. Another moment of silence passed before Magnus uncrossed his arms and got up.

“I… I will never be able to thank you enough for saving me,” he said before he turned away. “Goodbye, Alexander.”

Alec watched him go with a clenched jaw and curled fists. Then he closed his eyes and dropped his head with a deep and heavy sigh.

“Alec?”

Another sigh, and Alec looked up at his little sister who was holding a letter. She held it out to him and he took it, his frown turning into an expression of puzzlement.

“What is this?”  
“I don’t know,” Izzy replied, crossing her arms. “And I know that maybe now is not a good time, but you stressed how important this is. You gave this to me before you went to Alicante, and told me to keep it hidden and secret and give it back to you after Asmodeus is dead and Magnus is back.”

Magnus stopped on his way to the door upon hearing his name, and turned halfway around.

“I guess that was before I forgot everything,” Alec said slowly.  
“Yes.” Izzy shrugged. “And it doesn’t make sense that you forgot this and not Asmodeus… but I don’t know what it is. You didn’t tell me.”  
“I’m pretty sure I had a good reason,” Alec said, frustration radiating from every word. 

He broke the seal and frowned at the empty paper. Izzy leaned a little forward and handed him her stele, and after drawing a rune onto the paper the letters appeared. Alec began to read.

His eyes widened, very slowly. His lips parted as well. He suddenly lowered the paper, his mouth falling open, and he quickly looked down again, his eyes racing across the writing to find the point where he had left off.

“Oh my god,” he whispered and dropped the letter. He shot out of his chair so fast it toppled over, and he almost bowled Jace and Catarina over who were on their way back.

“Alec!” Izzy set off after him. “Alec! I’m pretty sure you shouldn’t be running!”

Jace and Catarina exchanged a puzzled look, but quickly set the mugs down to follow Izzy and Alec. They were joined by Magnus, and all four of them followed Alec to his room.

Izzy stopped in the doorway, staring at Alec with her mouth hanging open while the latter was crawling into his wardrobe until only his legs were still visible. He was rummaging around in there accompanied by muffled curses, and when he emerged again, he was clutching a small, wooden box.

“Alec, what the hell?” Jace pushed past Izzy into the room. “What has gotten into you now?”

Alec didn’t answer him. Ignoring Jace and everyone else he looked at the box, and at the piece of paper covered with Alec’s handwriting that was tied to the box with a rubber band. He pulled the elastic off and read the note, shaking his head over and over again. Then he opened the box.

Inside was a small vial the size of an egg. It was filled with a mint-green liquid in which golden and silver whirls were floating around, giving it the appearance of being alive.

“Alec, what is that,” Izzy demanded. “What are you doing?”

Alec ignored her too; he uncorked the vial and before anyone could move, brought it to his lips. He knocked it back and swallowed. 

Nothing happened.

Alec stared at the bottle. He looked up at the others, nothing but confusion in his eyes.

“Alec?” Jace asked, leaning forward.

Suddenly Alec’s eyes flew open, and he gasped for air.

“Alec!” Jace grabbed him by the shoulders. “Shit... Cat! Magnus!”

Alec doubled over with a groan, covering his face with his hands, and Jace slung one arm around his waist to support him. “Fuck,” he muttered. “Magnus, what was in that bottle?”

Magnus pushed past the others into the room and picked up the vial that Alec had dropped. He activated his magic, but before he could do anything else Alec straightened up again.

And he huffed out a breath that sounded almost like a chuckle.

Every pair of eyes in the room was suddenly glued to Alec’s face.

Alec looked around with wide eyes, an incredulous smile forming on his face.

“It worked,” he whispered. “It worked!” The next breath that escaped him was a soft laugh, and he spun around to look at Magnus. “It worked!”

The bright, brilliant smile and breathless laugh softened again as he looked at Magnus.

“Magnus,” he said, and took a step forward. “Magnus, it worked...”  
“Alec?” Magnus asked tonelessly and dropped the vial again. “What worked?”

Instead of giving him an answer Alec closed the distance between them and pulled him into an embrace, closing his arms around Magnus as tightly as he could.

Magnus tensed. “Alec?”  
“It’s okay,” Alec muttered into Magnus’ hair. “You’re back. It’s okay. It worked. It all worked.”

Then Alec let go and stepped back, but kept his hands on Magnus’ shoulders. He was grinning like an idiot.

“Hey,” he said and rested a hand on Magnus’ cheek. “I’m sorry. I know this was... It was part of the plan, but I was... never mind. It worked.”  
“Alec...” Magnus tilted his head. “What are you talking about?”  
“My plan,” Alec said, and looked around at the others, still grinning.

“Care to explain?” Jace asked and crossed his arms.

Alec’s smile dimmed a little and he cleared his throat.

“I remembered what Magnus had told me, back in the loft, after... after he had come back from Edom. About the memories.” He looked at Magnus. “You were afraid someone would take my memories of you. Your father, right?”

Magnus could only nod, staring helplessly up at Alec, because suddenly Alec was looking at him like he used to, not as if he was a stranger.

“So I realised I had to protect them,” Alec went on. “But for that, I needed a powerful warlock, and because I couldn’t leave a trace, I had to find a warlock like that as far away from New York as possible. So when I was in Alicante I didn’t only look for a way to get rid of Asmodeus, but also for a warlock who could help me. I found one in Addis Ababa.”

Everyone stared at him, and Alec quickly carried on with his explanation.

“I knew from the beginning that whatever it is that could protect my memories, it would affect them somehow, maybe they would have to be shielded, or locked away somewhere. That’s why I wrote that letter I gave to you, Izz. I wrote my whole plan down, and that’s why I told you no one was to talk about Magnus when I came back. I didn’t want anyone to suspect that I had done something with those memories. And in that letter I wrote to myself what I had planned to do with my memories, and that I would have carried some sort of clue with me from wherever my search in Alicante would bring me.”

He nodded at Catarina.

“And that’s why I had to start with you. I asked Catarina for help, and then I told her not to contact me again until Izzy let her know that Asmodeus was dead. Then she did her thing, but during all that time there was no contact between us, and everything was kept a secret just like I wanted.”

Alec looked back at Magnus, his smile widening again.

“The warlock in Addis Ababa took my memories and conserved them in that potion. I told her to remove everything that had to do with you, and only leave my plan to kill Asmodeus, because that needed to happen to get you back. And I wrote a note to myself before she took them. I wrote that this box contains the most precious thing I have ever owned, and would ever own, but that I must not open it, under no circumstances, until I know what is inside. And when I read that letter Izzy had given me I knew that this had to be the clue to my memories. Or, my actual memories, in this case. And since the not-talking about Magnus worked pretty well, no one suspected that my memories were gone, had been gone the whole time.”

“Not until Jace blabbed,” Izzy said, giving the man in question a _look_.  
“Not until that demon attack,” Jace added defensively.

Alec shrugged with a grin. “At that point though it wasn’t crucial anymore. Everyone believed the demon had taken my memories, so I was perfectly safe. Just confused.”  
“And very, very angry,” Izzy added.  
“Yeah...” Alec shrugged again. “But it didn’t matter. My memories were kept safe, and Asmodeus is dead.” He closed his eyes and his smile vanished for a moment. Then he opened them again and took a deep breath. “Magnus is back, and so are my memories.”

His smile was back when Alec looked at Magnus again. Magnus shook his head, looking at him with an incredulous smile, and as he blinked, tears broke free from his eyes.

“Alexander... you never cease to amaze me.”

Alec closed his arms around him again and pulled him close, and Magnus sank against him, burying his face into Alec’s shoulder.

“Alec, you’re a genius,” Jace said, shaking his head. “But how... it was pretty risky. How could you be so sure this plan would really work?”

“Because anything else wasn’t an option,” Alec muttered without lifting his face out of Magnus’ hair. One of his hands was gently caressing Magnus’ back. “I promised Magnus I wouldn’t give up on him. I promised him I would fix this.”

He slowly let go of Magnus again and leaned back, to cradle Magnus’ face in his hands. Their eyes met, and they both leaned forward, slowly and almost hesitantly, until their lips touched.

“This is the point where we go back upstairs,” Catarina whispered, but she could have used a megaphone and it wouldn’t have bothered the two kissing men.

The four left the room but Jace stopped with a small smile on his face, his hand on the door handle.

The unmistakable sound of a portal opening was coming from Alec’s room. Jace nodded in satisfaction and followed Izzy and Catarina upstairs, after closing the door to Alec’s room.


	10. Chapter 10

Alec and Magnus more stumbled than stepped out of the portal in Magnus’ loft, and as soon as they had steadied themselves they had their arms around each other again. After a few more passionate kisses they parted, but didn’t let go of each other, resting their foreheads together.

“I missed you,” Alec muttered.  
“I missed you too,” Magnus replied and swallowed. “And I thought.... I thought I’d never see you again.”  
“I told you I wouldn’t give up on you.”  
“Yes.” Magnus leaned back to look at him, his eyes soft and brimming with tears. “But as much as I have faith in your determination, that didn’t mean you would succeed.”  
“Anything else wasn’t an option,” Alec replied and kissed his forehead.

Magnus closed his eyes and nestled his head into the crook of Alec’s neck with a sigh. “Thank you,” he whispered. “Alexander, I-”  
“Don’t say it,” Alec cut in gently. “You owe me nothing; you’d have done the same for me.”  
Magnus closed his arms a little tighter around Alec’s chest. “I love you,” he muttered into Alec’s shoulder.”  
“I love you too,” Alec whispered back. “And now let me take you to bed. You’ve literally been to hell and back and you need someone to take care of you for a bit.”

Magnus leaned back again, a crooked little smile on his face. “And what about you? It’s only a few hours ago that two warlocks had to reconstruct half of your face from scratch because a greater demon went up in flames in front of your nose.”  
“I guess we both need some rest,” Alec said with a twitch of his head. “But I said something about a bed, didn’t I?”  
“You did.” Magnus reached out and caressed Alec’s cheek, smiling as Alec nuzzled into the palm of his hand. “And I wish we could do more than resting, but I’m afraid I... I had a few hard days.”

Alec just smiled at him and leaned close to drop a kiss onto Magnus’ lips. Then he wordlessly took his hand and led him to the bedroom.

Once there he started unbuttoning Magnus’ shirt, slowly and deliberately, and then gently pushed it down his shoulders. Magnus closed his eyes with a deep sigh as Alec began to trail soft kisses down his neck and across his shoulder. His hands momentarily trapped in the sleeves of the shirt hanging down his waist he could only rest them on Alec’s hips.

Alec continued to brush his lips across the skin of Magnus’ neck and shoulders, and Magnus shuddered under the gentle touches. Then Alec leaned back again and helped Magnus out of the sleeves of his shirt, and lifted his arms when Magnus took the hem of Alec’s sweater. Once Alec was bare-chested as well they embraced again, skin on skin, and their hands caressed each other’s back.

Their kisses grew heated again, and now Alec trailed his kisses down Magnus’ chest and abdomen until he was on his knees. He unbuckled the belt, undid the buttons and the zipper, and helped Magnus shed the trousers, but Magnus had to brace himself with one hand against Alec’s shoulder while stepping out of his trouser legs. He let himself fall onto the bed afterwards and watched with a smile as Alec quickly got rid of his jeans, and when he fell down beside him both let themselves sink back into the mattress, dressed down to their underwear.

They shared a few more kisses, slow and passionate, while their hands caressed each other’s skin. But when they had to part for air and snuggled up to each other, it didn’t take more than five seconds before Alec had to yawn. He valiantly tried to fight it, but failed.

“It’s okay,” Magnus said with a soft chuckle. “There’s no denying we’re both exhausted.” He reached out, rested a hand against Alec’s cheek and nudged his head around so they were looking at each other again. “Let’s just cuddle a bit,” he said, still smiling. “And tomorrow we’ll have breakfast in bed, and some coffee, and then we can enjoy having each other back.”  
Alec frowned at him with a tiny pout. “I really missed you.”  
“And I missed you.” Magnus placed a tender kiss onto Alec’s lips. “I missed you like... I missed you so much that sometimes I couldn’t breathe...”

Alec turned onto his side and lifted one arm, and Magnus immediately moved closer and turned around. Alec loved spooning him and Magnus never complained, he loved the feeling of vanishing into Alec’s embrace. Alec nuzzled the back of his head and yawned again, and Magnus couldn’t stop his own yawn and didn’t even try.

They both chuckled, and after some shuffling and adjusting, Magnus snapped his fingers and the blanket settled over them like another gentle caress.

They were both out like a light within moments.

* * *

When Alec woke up it was at some point in the later afternoon, judging by the light falling through the window. But considering their various ordeals over the past few days it was no wonder they had slept most of the day away. Magnus was sitting upright and slightly hunched over, and Alec could see he was trembling.

“Magnus?”

Magnus slowly turned his head to look at him. “I’m sorry... I didn’t mean to wake you.”  
“It’s okay,” Alec sat up as well and closed his arms around Magnus to pull him close. “A nightmare?”  
“Yes,” Magnus replied with a trembling sigh.  
“Your father?”

Magnus tensed, and after a moment he pulled away from Alec, but only so he could look at him.

“I need to tell you something.”  
Alec nodded and took one of Magnus’ hands, running his thumb across his knuckles.  
“I... My father,” Magnus began hesitantly. “He was working on overthrowing Lilith’s rule while she was gone and instating himself as lone ruler over Edom, one united Edom. He started making alliances with several of the Lords of Sin. Particularly the Lord of Greed.”

He paused for a moment, and Alec increased the pressure of his fingers around Magnus’ hand.

“And I... I was what he needed,” Magnus went on and looked up. “Political alliances come at a price. Or are forged by a marriage.”

Alec blinked twice, and the gentle look in his face turned to boiling anger. “He made you marry? Marry what? A demon?”  
“Two. A pair of sisters, but that’s...” Magnus replied haltingly. “But... well... I...” Then he shook his head, a wry, crooked smile appearing on his face. “I learned from the best, I guess. I stood at the altar, but before the ritual knife could draw my blood for the oath I bolted.”  
Alec’s face relaxed a little, and he lifted one eyebrow.  
“But in this case there was no dashing, handsome stranger who pulled me into a searing kiss to make everything better,” Magnus went on, the smile widening a tiny bit.  
“I would have,” Alec said, a smile tugging at one corner of his mouth.  
“I know.” Magnus’s smile softened. “So... the union wasn’t fulfilled. And my father...” The smile vanished and he closed his eyes.

Alec didn’t let go of Magnus’ hand, but adjusted his position so he could drape his other arm around Magnus to pull him close.

“He was furious,” Magnus whispered, leaning into Alec’s embrace. “Not only did I cost him an alliance, I humiliated him in front of his entire kingdom and all the nobility of Edom.”  
Alec swallowed hard and tightened his hold. “What did he do to you,” he whispered tonelessly, trying hard to keep his seething fury out of his voice.  
“It wasn’t so much what he did to me,” Magnus said, likewise in a whisper. “It was the threat that he would go and find you, and everyone else I care about, to torture them to death in front of my eyes while making sure that they knew I was the reason for their suffering.”

“If I hadn’t already killed him I would kill him now,” Alec said, his voice calm and slow, but cold with fury.  
Magnus rested his free hand on Alec’s cheek, and some of the tension seeped out of Alec’s shoulders again. “You’re safe now, and that’s all that matters. And I... I shouldn’t have caved in. I risked all of your lives.”  
“You don’t know that,” Alec said. “I was prepared. I was working on a plan to kill Asmodeus from the moment I left you here.”  
“Plans are well and good, but Asmodeus is a greater dem-”  
“Was,” Alec said flatly. “He was a greater demon.” Then his expression softened as well as his voice. “I know what a hold he had on you. If I was threatened with your death, or with you being tortured, I don’t know what I’d have done.”  
Magnus looked at the mattress. “You wouldn’t have run like a coward.”

Now Alec huffed out a chuckle. “You just mentioned something about running away from an altar to escape a political marriage.”  
“Yes,” Magnus looked up again. “But your father didn’t plan to torture all your friends to death.”  
“No, but...” Alec sighed. “This is pointless.”

He leaned closer and pressed a firm and gentle kiss onto Magnus’ lips.

“Alec,” Magnus whispered as Alec broke the contact.  
Alec hummed softly.  
“The nightmare...” He took a deep breath. “It wasn’t about my father. My would-have-been brides found me in my father’s dungeon. They wanted to claim me, they said, because I had been promised to them.”  
Alec was gritting his teeth so hard it was audible.  
“Alexander.” Magnus ran his fingers down Alec’s cheek. “Catarina chose that very moment to start the summoning ritual. They didn’t lay a hand on me.” Then he swallowed. “But...”  
“But you’re afraid they might come after you.”

Magnus nodded and looked at the window.

Alec was silent and in thought for a moment. “How powerful are they?” He asked then. “I’m not trying to sound cocky, but...”  
Magnus looked at him again with a smile. “They aren’t that powerful, but they are succubi, and they can shape-shift... and...”  
“And they could disguise themselves as me to get close to you.”  
Magnus nodded again.  
“Damn.” Alec pressed his lips together.

Magnus was surrounded by an aura of fear and defeat. Alec looked at him for a moment and rolled his shoulders.

“Magnus, could you summon them?”  
“Summon them?” Magnus’ head flew up. “Are you nuts?”  
“Maybe,” Alec replied. “But if you summon them, then we can kill them, can’t we?”  
Magnus opened his mouth, but it took him a while to find words. “Alexander... if we do that, we’ll have to deal with their father.”  
“The Lord of Greed?”  
“One of his lieutenants.”  
“And if we kill that father, will the Lord of Greed come after us?”  
“Alexander, are you planning on killing every demon in Edom?” Now there was a hint of exasperated amusement in Magnus’ voice.  
“If I have to,” Alec replied, with absolutely no amusement whatsoever.

Magnus’ smile vanished, and he let his air escape him in a long sigh. “I don’t think so,” he said finally. “The Lords of Sin aren’t known for being sentimental, and if he gets himself killed by mortals, well...” He shrugged. “Then he hasn’t deserved the position in the first place in their eyes.”  
“Good.” Alec squared his shoulders.  
“Alexander,” Magnus said with a fond smile. “You’re impossible.”  
“Impossible just means you have to try again,” Alec replied. “And now, could you open a portal into the Institute?”  
“What? Why?” Magnus tilted his head.  
“If there’s a possibility you have demons on your trail I want to be armed.” Alec got up and found his jeans. “Don’t worry, I’ll be right back, just keep the portal open.”  
“Alexander...”

Alec spun around, thrusting out his forefinger. “Magnus, we didn’t go through all that only for you to get killed by a scorned demon bitch. Or two of them. I love you, and I won’t risk anything, and won’t let you risk any more. I’m going to get a Seraph blade, and I won’t let you out of my sight until those bitches and their father are no longer a threat.”  
“I guess there’s no talking you out of this,” Magnus said with a lopsided smile.

A long, dark look from under his impressive eyebrows was all the answer Alec was willing to give, and with a sigh, Magnus opened a portal. Alec nodded and stepped through it after giving Magnus another worried look.

“Alec?” Jace looked up from his screen as Alec stormed past him, quickly getting up to follow. “What the... what are you doing here? You should be in bed?”  
“I need a weapon,” Alec said without looking at him. “Magnus just told me there’s a chance that one or both of the succubus demons his father tried to force him to marry is still after him for revenge.”  
“Woah...” Jace shook his head, keeping step beside him. “There are so many things in that one sentence that I don’t like.”  
“I know.”

Alec helped himself to a Seraph blade and a matching dagger before he headed back to the portal.

“I’ll do the paperwork tomorrow.”  
“Don’t worry about stupid paperwork.” Jace shooed him away. “Izzy can do that. Go keep your warlock safe.”  
A smile appeared on Alec’s face. “Thanks, Jace.”  
“I can still hear you and that means you’re still here.” Jace shooed again.

Alec’s smile promptly dropped off his face when he emerged from the portal to an empty bedroom.

“Magnus!!” He stormed into the living area, blades at the ready.  
“Kitchen!” Magnus stuck his head out with an apologetic smile. “I’m sorry, I was starving.”  
Alec relaxed again and walked towards the kitchen, but kept casting distrustful glances into every corner. “Sandwiches?”  
“Want one?”  
“You shouldn’t be conjuring up too much yet.”  
Magnus rolled his eyes. “It’s just a sandwich.”  
Alec put the blade on the kitchen island, and grabbed the other half of the sandwich and bit into it. “And that won’t get us anywhere,” he said around the food in his mouth. “We should order takeout.”

Magnus looked at him for a moment before turning around with a dramatic sigh. “Fine.” He opened the drawer where he kept the menus. “What are you in the mood for?”  
“I’m not fussy,” Alec replied and stuffed the rest of the sandwich into his mouth.  
“You sure?”  
Alec nodded and swallowed. “I figure you’re the one with cravings for New York cuisine at this point.”  
“That...” Magnus took one leaflet. “... is undeniable. You can’t get a decent pizza anywhere in Edom,” he said with a dramatic lift of his eyebrows, making Alec smile.

They ended up ordering pizza and sushi, because Magnus couldn’t make up his mind, and because they agreed they were both hungry enough after all to eat a horse, hoofs and all.

Magnus looked around in his loft after leaving the kitchen, but froze when he looked at Alec who walked behind him, blade and dagger in hands.

“You look...” Magnus cleared his throat.  
Alec lifted one eyebrow expectantly.  
“Hot,” Magnus said eventually after his eyes had roamed over Alec’s form for a moment. “Seriously hot... in those tight black jeans and bare-chested and with those blades...” He licked his lips.

A smirk appeared on Alec’s face as he strode closer. Magnus took a step back, and then he suddenly had the wall at his back with Alec very much invading his personal space, still bare-chested and with a blade in one hand and a dagger in the other.

“This...” Magnus began in a husky voice, “...is disturbingly arousing.”

As an answer Alec just kissed him, anything but gentle and tender this time, and without letting go of his blades. Magnus opened his lips with a soft hum, and closed his arms around Alec as the latter pressed closer, his fingers digging into the skin of Alec’s back. Alec was grinding their hips together and finally let go of Magnus’ lips to trail his kisses down the side of Magnus’ neck, and up again to suck at his Adam’s apple. Magnus pulled Alec closer with a husky moan.

“I see you haven’t forgotten anything yet,” he whispered.  
“I would be ashamed of myself if I had,” Alec whispered back. He placed a few more not-so-gentle kisses on the side of Magnus’ neck.

They were still busily making out against the wall when the doorbell made them both jump.

Magnus turned away with a very undignified giggle. “That’ll be the pizza,” he said.  
“Fuck the pizza,” Alec muttered into the skin of his shoulder.  
“I’d rather fuck you, darling, but I’m afraid we’ll both perish if we don’t get any food before the attempt.”

Then he slipped out from between Alec and the wall, and went to open the door as he was the more presentable one of the two. For a given value of, at least.

The poor delivery boy did a double-take when Magnus opened the door, clad in silk pyjama pants and an untied silk robe over a bare chest and with a massive hickey on his collarbone, while Alec stood further back in the room, wearing only black jeans and armed with a blade and a dagger. He was glaring at the poor boy from below the fringe of his mussed hair.

“Here,” Magnus said and magnanimously handed the delivery boy a $50 note as tip. “Have a nice evening.”

Alec had to admit that food before sex seemed like the better alternative as his stomach announced Alec’s neglect very loudly. They sat down, and Magnus broke out into laughter when Alec’s phone chose that moment to ring.

“Your face...” Magnus snorted while Alec gave him a death glare. “Priceless.”

“Yeah, Izzy.” Alec closed his eyes with a groan.  
_“Sorry Alec, I know you’re... busy. But I have a Clave representative here and-”_  
“And you can tell them I’ll deal with everything tomorrow,” Alec interrupted her. “Sorry Izz, I know how much of a pain that is, but I’ve literally just sat down to eat and I haven’t had anything since lunch yesterday.”  
_“It’s okay, really. If you’d have told me you’re on your way I’d have tried to talk you out of it.”_  
Alec chuckled. “Yeah, I figured.” Then his smile vanished. “Look, I know why they’re here. You can tell them that. I’ll be there to answer any questions and make statements and everything, but it’s not even twenty-four hours that I had a greater demon blow up in my face. I could really use a bit of rest.”  
_“Rest.”_ A pause. _“You’re not expecting me to believe tha-”_  
“Izzy,” Alec cut her off and face-palmed. “I’ll be there tomorrow after breakfast.”  
_“Message received loud and clear,”_ Izzy replied, the smile audible in her voice. _“I’ll see you tomorrow. Good night!”_

Alec stared at his phone and pointedly switched it off before putting it down on the nearest shelf, and Magnus offered him a slice of pizza with the sweetest smile he could muster. They wolfed down the pizza and also most of the sushi before Alec grabbed Magnus’ hand as soon as the latter had put the napkin down.

Magnus was giggling again as Alec dragged him to the bedroom.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Double update today because I wanted this done before Christmas and because it's my birthday. :) 
> 
> Thank you all for reading and commenting and making me smile, you're the best! I have a sequel planned for this, though I don't think I can start on that until the new year has started.

Alec usually woke at six, a time he was so used to after so long that he rarely needed an alarm, because most days he was already sitting up when it went off. Now it was definitely past six o’clock but Alec couldn’t check because his phone was somewhere out in the living room, switched off and neglected. He was pretty sure Izzy had called him twice already, at least, and with a Clave representative breathing down her neck he couldn’t blame her.

He was alone in bed, but he could hear music coming from the kitchen. Smiling, he stretched and arched his back, and got up to find his underwear. Once dressed he grabbed his weapons and left the bedroom.

“Armed in my kitchen?” Magnus cast him a look that was part amused, part puzzled.  
“Not risking a demon getting between me and my weapons,” Alec replied. “Is there coffee yet?”  
Magnus smiled softly at him and snapped his fingers. “Freshly brewed and ready to drink.”  
“Should you be conjuring so much already?” Alec said and let his eyes roam over waffles, fruit, orange juice, and creamy yoghurt.

“Alexander.” Magnus stepped close and tugged at the collar of Alec’s sweater. “I feel quite restored,” he said, and a smile appeared on his lips. “A bit of... exercise, and a good night’s sleep does wonder for my physical and magical constitution.”  
Alec chuckled and put the weapons down on the kitchen island to pick up his coffee. “Exercise? Is that what we are calling it now?”  
“Well, we did break a bit of a sweat,” Magnus purred and stepped close enough so their bodies touched at the hips. “But it was far more engaging than going for a run in Central Park.”  
Alec’s smile turned into a small grin. “Very engaging.”

Magnus hooked his thumbs into the belt loops of Alec’s jeans. Alec lifted both eyebrows and took a sip of his coffee.

“But...if I’m not mistaken then you have an appointment with a Clave representative,” Magnus said with a small pout. “Which is regrettable, because if I remember correctly, early morning exercise is hugely beneficial for the constitution as well.”  
“I fear we have to postpone,” Alec said, the smile vanishing. “The longer I let the Clave wait, the worse their mood will be and the longer this will take.” He eyed the lovingly prepared breakfast with mournful eyes.  
“Don’t worry, I’ll keep it nice and fresh for when you come back.”  
“When we come back,” Alec said and rested a gentle hand against Magnus’ cheek. “I won’t let you out of my sight yet, so I’m afraid you’ll have to come along.”

“Alexander,” Magnus said, kissed his palm and looked at Alec again. “I am quite capable of looking after myself. And I am quite confident about being able to deal with a succubus.”  
“Yesterday you were-”  
Magnus held a finger against Alec’s lips. “Yesterday I was still exhausted. Today, I feel brilliant. And I am sure that any question involving the omamori charm or the horrible wine in Bucharest will let me discern between you and a shape-shifting demon.”

Alec’s smile was back, and he pecked a kiss against the tip of Magnus’ finger. He also gave it a tiny flick with his tongue which earned him a slightly undignified huff.

“Tease.”  
“It’s not a tease,” Alec said and put the empty cup down, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “It’s a promise.”  
“Oh.” Magnus dipped his head forward and nipped the side of Alec’s neck. “Good thing you’re a man of your word, Alexander.”

Alec clamped his arms around Magnus and pulled him close, hugging him really hard for a moment before letting go.

“Don’t do anything stupid,” he said and grabbed a single waffle for the way.  
“Don’t worry, Alexander. I’ll work on my wards and do some grocery shopping.”  
“But be care-”  
“Online, you mother hen,” Magnus said, rolling his eyes. “Off you go. The sooner you get this over with, the sooner you can be back to make good on that promise.”

He opened a portal, and Alec gave Magnus another look of ‘ _don’t get yourself into trouble or else_ ’, bit into his waffle and stepped through the portal to the Institute.

“Alec!” Izzy’s smile couldn’t have been any wider as she spotted him. “How’s Magnus?”  
“He’s fine.” Alec stuffed the rest of the waffle into his mouth. “But I’d prefer not to leave him alone just yet so I want to get this over with.”  
“Then let’s,” Izzy said. “They’re waiting in your office.”  
“Where’s Jace?”  
Izzy sagged a little. “He’s out on patrol. He needed something to do, he said.”

Alec nodded and sighed, and let Izzy sort his hair with a few practised swipes of her fingers.

“Long night?” She whispered with a wink, her eyes on the side of his neck.  
Closing his eyes, Alec sighed. “How bad is it?”  
“On a scale of _One_ to ‘ _Ten – Shouldn’t leave the house without a scarf_ ’ it’s about... six, I’d say. She patted his arm. “They will survive.”  
“Good.” Alec rolled his shoulders. “Let’s get this over with.”

Alec and Izzy headed towards Alec’s office in silence, but Izzy smiled up at her big brother ever so often.

“What is it?” He asked quietly right before they reached his office.  
“Nothing,” she replied just as quietly. “I just haven’t seen you this relaxed in a while.”  
“I had a lot on my mind,” Alec said and squared his shoulders before opening the door.

He froze and cleared his throat.

“Clave representative Branwell,” Lydia said with a formal smile. “Nice to see you again, Mr. Lightwood.”  
“The pleasure is all mine, Miss Branwell,” Alec replied and shook the offered hand in sheer reflex.  
“Also, my associates,” Lydia said and indicated towards two men in Clave uniforms. “George Plainfield and Doug Rutherford.”

A few nods were exchanged, and Alec ignored the cold, calculating stares.

“Right, let’s get down to business,” Lydia said with a smile that widened as her eyes swept over Alec’s face.  
“Definitely,” Alec replied and regretted not asking Izzy for some concealer.

Lydia picked up a tablet and read through a few lines. The other two representatives stood at the wall next to the window, staring at Alec and his sister with unmoving faces.

“So, Asmodeus,” Lydia began. “There were rumours that he had planned an attack in New York. Where did you pick up these rumours?”  
“The warlock community,” Alec replied. “Although I can’t give you any more details.”

“Warlock community.” One of the other Clave representatives, Plainfield, gave Alec a cold look. “You have a rather close... involvement with a particular warlock, Mr. Lightwood, have you not?”  
“Magnus Bane, former high warlock of Brooklyn, yes. We’re in a committed relationship.” Alec squarely met his eyes. “But I fail to see what this has to do with the case of Asmodeus.”

“Let’s stick to the topic,” Lydia said and looked at Alec again. “You came to the library of Alicante and consulted the Silent Brothers about Asmodeus. And I assume you found something?”  
“I did. I was informed by the Silent Brothers that to kill Asmodeus, the wound would have to be imbued with angel blood.”  
“And what did you decide to do with that knowledge?”

Alec straightened up and folded his hands behind his back, a soldier’s posture. “I did nothing. However, had all else failed, I would have coated a Seraph blade with my blood and attempted to kill him.”  
“That would have been suicide,” Lydia said with a frown.  
“I am well aware of that,” Alec replied.

Lydia looked at her tablet again, and back at Alec. “Who did you share this knowledge with?”  
“My sister and my parabatai,” Alec said. “And... regretfully also my mother. It wasn’t my intention to get her involved.”  
“So the burnt body we found was indeed Maryse Lightwood.”  
“Yes.” Alec dropped his head. “I couldn’t save her... I...”  
“Alec.” Lydia stepped closer. “Your mother was many things, but a fool, she wasn’t. She knew beforehand that this was a suicide mission.”

Now Plainfield stepped forward. “So you went to Prospect Park on a recon mission,” he said. “Was your mother already there?”  
“Yes,” Alec replied, his back ramrod straight again. “She engaged Asmodeus while I was still trying to assess the situation.”  
“And what did you do?”  
“I took a shot at him. “Alec looked at him. “But he incinerated the arrow and damaged my bow in the resulting blast.”  
Plainfield narrowed his eyes. “So your mother killed Asmodeus?”  
“No.” Alec took a deep breath. “He grabbed her and slit her throat.” He swallowed hard. “And I... I didn’t really think. I took my blade and ran her through, and him too.”

“So that was the angel blood that killed him?” Lydia asked. “Your mother’s blood?”  
“Yes.” Alec swallowed again.  
Lydia’s eyes softened a bit as she watched Alec for a moment. “Did you know she would engage him like that?”  
“If I had known I would have been more careful,” Alec gave back, and shook his head. “Although I should have known.”

“Why?” Rutherford asked coldly, no sympathy for his mourning of a loved one in his voice.  
“Because she was having a hard time with her life,” Alec replied, meeting his eyes. “It’s not my place to say if she deserved her punishment or not, but losing her runes… She was a broken woman.”  
Lydia stepped closer to Alec and put her tablet down. “And you think she wanted rehabilitation?”  
“I don’t know.” Alec shook his head. “Maybe she just wanted a true Shadowhunter death. A death with meaning.”

Plainfield, the one who had made no effort to hide his feelings about Magnus, now narrowed his eyes. “And you have no idea where she got those weapons and the stele she carried?”  
“No.” Alec met his eyes. “And you can put me before the Soulsword if you want. I don’t know.”

It was a risky move, of course. The right questions would still get the whole truth, but he was counting on Lydia’s obvious disinterest in delving any deeper into this issue. It was almost as if she was on his side and had been from the beginning.

“That won’t be necessary,” she said and picked up the tablet again. “Despite our differences in the past, I can say confidently that Mr.. Lightwood is not the kind of man to purposefully engage a greater demon with nothing but a blade, and the company of an excommunicated, de-runed Shadowhunter.”  
“Mr. Lightwood has been known for going on unsanctioned missions before, Miss Branwell.” Plainfield gave Alec another cold look. “And other reckless behaviour.”

“Mr. Plainfield,” Lydia said sharply. “Neither the unsanctioned missions concerning Valentine and the Mortal Cup nor Mr. Lightwood’s personal relationships are subject of this investigation. Mr. Lightwood diligently prepared himself for the possibility of a greater demon attack, and followed Clave protocol when it came to pass. He gave orders not to engage and went on a recon mission himself. And while it was risky to attack a greater demon like he did, he was able to seize the one opportunity he had to stop the demon before he could do any damage. And thank the Angel he emerged victorious, even if the same cannot be said about his mother.”

With that, Lydia declared the case closed, and congratulated Alec on his victory over a greater demon. On the way out, she fell behind the other two representatives however, and stayed for a moment longer after those had stepped through the portal. She checked they were gone, then walked up to Alec to give him a hug.

“I’m so sorry about your mother,” she said. “I will put in a request for the Clave to honour her sacrifice with a burial in Idris.”  
Alec tensed, but returned the embrace after a moment. “Thanks,” he muttered.  
“And... don’t worry,” Lydia said then after letting go. “I won’t recommend you for a promotion to the council. I know you don’t want that.”  
“Thanks for that, too,” Alec replied with a lopsided smile, and then tilted his head with a questioning frown. “Did you volunteer for this mission?”  
“No.” Lydia smiled brightly at him. “I was nominated. I have reason to believe the Clave chose me because they assumed that I couldn’t possibly be biased in your favour.”

Alec frowned. Lydia pointedly raised both eyebrows.

“Oh.” Alec huffed out an embarrassed little chuckle. “Because I ditched you at the altar for a warlock.”  
Lydia smiled and touched his arm. “You and Magnus okay again?”  
“Yes.” Alec nodded enthusiastically. “We’re good.”  
“Good. I didn’t take you for the kind of man to collide with open cupboard doors. Give Magnus my best.”

Behind him Izzy emitted a very unladylike snort, and Alec felt his cheeks redden. Lydia smiled her brightest, sunniest smile, and waved as she stepped through the portal.

Alec exhaled heavily with puffed cheeks, one of his hands digging into the hair on the back of his head.

“Hey.” Izzy elbowed him in the ribs and looked up at him.  
“Hmm?” Alec looked down at her and couldn’t suppress a small smile when he saw her face.  
“Tell me you’re taking the rest of the day off.”  
Alec looked around and took another deep breath that he huffed out very slowly. “I really want to.”  
“Then go.” Izzy slipped her arm through his and steered him towards the main doors. “Don’t come back today. Not tomorrow either.”  
“Izzy...”  
“You have been almost blown up by a greater demon,” Izzy said. “Go to bed and tell Magnus I said he’s not to let you get up again.”  
Alec rubbed a hand down his face.  
“Doctor’s orders.”  
“You’re not a doctor, Izzy.”  
“No.” She smiled sweetly up at him. “But if you ask the doctors and medics in the infirmary you shouldn’t have left the bed at all yet, so I’m letting you off lightly.”

Now Alec had to chuckle. He turned around and gave his sister a hug, and kissed her cheek for good measure.

“I don’t want to hear from you for at least a couple of days,” Izzy said firmly, but with a smile.  
“Call me if-”  
“If we have another greater demon in the Institute. Say hi to Magnus from me.”

Alec left with a smile, and chose to pretend that he didn’t hear her ‘ _and give him your best too_ ’ as he stepped through the door.

He had to admit it was nice being outside in the mild, sunny weather, for once not being on high alert even if he was in a hurry to get home. His thoughts kept darting back to his mother, but despite the ache in his heart he knew that she had gotten what she had wished for. Alec was alive and well, Magnus was home. The angel blood that had had to be spilled had been hers, and she had found a death with meaning.

“I hope you’re at peace,” he whispered into the wind, and the soft breeze tugged playfully at a few strands of his hair. It brought a small, wistful smile to Alec’s face, but then he rolled his shoulders and focused on life, like he knew his mother would have wanted. He sent Magnus a text, letting him know he was on his way home, and got on his way.

* * *

“Hey Magnus! I’m home!”  
“Grab a bite to eat, dear! I’m in the bedroom!”  
“That sounds promising,” Alec said, but didn’t get another reply.

He immediately bee-lined for the kitchen, where he found his neglected breakfast. He made short work of two more waffles and a few pieces of fruit, then washed his hands and headed back towards the living room.

“Magnus?”

Alec stopped in the bedroom door, absolutely dumbstruck. The curtains had been closed and the room was cast in a warm, golden light. Candles were placed on every available surface. A sandalwood incense stick sweetened the air, and on the bed...

Draped across the golden satin sheets in nothing but his skin Magnus looked like the drawing of a god by a renaissance artist. One corner of the blanket was draped artistically and very strategically over a small section of his body, but left the rest of him uncovered.

Alec’s throat was suddenly so dry he could hardly swallow.

“I’m a little lonely,” Magnus whispered, a sensuous smile on his face. “Care to join me?”

Hastily unbuckling his belt Alec stepped closer, only to stop dead in his tracks again. He looked at Magnus, and a shiver ran down his spine when he saw that he was slipping one hand under that infuriatingly precise placed triangle of fabric.

Magnus lifted both eyebrows. “Are you going to stand there for the rest of the day?”

“Um,” Alec said and cleared his throat. “Do you... do you remember the wine in Bucharest?”

Magnus blinked rapidly a few times, clearly startled by the non-sequitur. Then he laughed, a deep, silky sound that send more shivers down Alec’s spine. “The wine was awful,” Magnus said with a chuckle. “But the chicken was great, and the sorbet was to die for. Don’t worry, I doubled my wards. We won’t be disturbed.”

Alec swallowed and continued struggling with his belt, and he almost lost his balance when he tried to kick off his jeans because he had forgotten his boots. Magnus laughed again, but it was a gentle sound, and free of even a trace of mocking.

“Do take your time, my love,” he said with a smile. “Although...I have to say that your desperate struggle with your wardrobe does some interesting things,” he pointedly lowered his gaze, “to your anatomy.”

Alec froze again, and despite the blush on his cheeks, he cocked one eyebrow and turned around, his back to Magnus. Then he bent over and took his sweet time unlacing his boots and pulling off his socks, Magnus’ husky groan bringing a smug smile to his face because two could play that game.

Once he had finally gotten rid of the rest of his clothing, he turned around again and knelt on the bed. Magnus looked at him with heavy eyelids, his eyes lined in black and surrounded by stardust.

“Missed me?” Alec asked softly and cupped the side of Magnus’ face in his hand.  
“‘Missed’ doesn’t even begin to cover it, my love.” Magnus nuzzled into the touch. “‘Ardent longing’ is the word I’d use.”  
Alec chuckled softly and leaned closer to capture Magnus’ lips in a kiss.

Magnus let himself be pushed onto his back, without breaking the contact of their lips. Alec rested his body on top of his, and nothing but the small piece of satin remained between them. He wasn’t in a hurry anymore, though. Taking his sweet time he covered Magnus’ face in gentle kisses, then moved on to his neck. He trailed light nips and kisses across the soft skin of his neck and shoulder, and moved down Magnus’ right arm, his hand, and his fingers. And after lacing his fingers with Magnus, he made his way back, leaving soft, tiny kisses in his wake until he reached his chest again. From there he repeated the procedure with Magnus’ left arm and hand.

“What are you doing?” Magnus asked in an amused whisper.  
“Kissing every inch of you,” Alec replied and moved on to Magnus’ perfectly sculpted chest. “It’s a self-assigned mission.”

Magnus buried his hand in Alec’s hair with a sigh, shivering ever so often under the light touches of Alec’s lips. Alec’s hands caressed every bit of skin he could reach while he lavished Magnus’ skin with kisses, but decided for the moment to forego the small triangle of satin and focussed his attention on Magnus’ legs, brushing lines of kisses down one leg, and up the other.

Magnus was breathing heavily and was visibly trying not to squirm when Alec finally removed the corner of the blanket.

“Every inch,” Alec whispered against the hot and sensitive skin, the last bit that Magnus desperately wanted him to finally touch. Now Magnus did squirm, pressing his head into the pillow with a soft moan while his fingers dug into the bed sheet.

Obviously, Alec was of the opinion that this particular area of Magnus’ body needed a more thorough kissing, and by the time he finally opened his lips Magnus was trying not to whimper. His hands buried gently into Alec’s hair, resting on his head like a blessing, Alec’s name falling from his lips like a prayer before he lost his capacity for words.

Only a few months ago Alec had literally been a blushing virgin, but Magnus had shown nothing but patience, understanding, and respect during his time of revelation. Alec had soon discovered that he loved giving head, and because he was a fast learner, had quickly found out what he had to do to push all of Magnus’ buttons.

He regularly reduced Magnus to a sweating, boneless, trembling mess. And Magnus wouldn’t have it any other way.

This time was no different. By the time Alec straightened up, wiping the back of his hand across his lips with a smug smile, Magnus wasn’t even able to open his eyes anymore. His smile turning warm and affectionate, Alec settled down at Magnus’ side and watched him, his chest still heaving with heavy breaths. After a moment Magnus was able to turn his head and finally, he did open his eyes. They were still a bit glassy from his climax, and he bore that special smile that was exclusive for his post-orgasmic bliss. Alec brushed a few stray strands of hair from Magnus’ forehead.

“I love you, Alexander,” Magnus whispered in a deep, husky voice.  
“I love you too,” Alec whispered back and dropped a tender kiss onto Magnus’ lips.  
“Give me a moment,” Magnus said then and closed his eyes again. “I’ll take care of you in a bit.”  
Alec pulled him close until Magnus’ head rested on his chest, then he closed his arms around him. “Take your time,” he muttered into Magnus’ hair. “You know I love holding you like this.”

And he did. Sometimes Magnus nodded off for a moment in his embrace, but Alec never complained. Magnus falling asleep in his arms was one of the sweetest feelings he knew, especially knowing that it had been him who had pushed Magnus into that delicious exhaustion.

This time Magnus stayed awake, however, and they both relished the feeling of closeness and the warmth of their embrace while they listened to each other’s breathing.

Eventually though Magnus pulled away from Alec again and buried the fingers of one hand into Alec’s hair to pull him into a kiss. He flicked Alec’s lips with his tongue and Alec opened his lips to the touch, and they were quickly humming softly into their kisses, their breathing picking up speed again.

Then Magnus pulled away, and this time it was him pushing Alec onto his back. Alec looked up again with flushed cheeks and hunger in his eyes. He still wasn’t that good at articulating what he wanted, but Magnus was able to read him nonetheless. This time however he didn’t need to.

“Magnus,” Alec whispered roughly. “I want you so much...”  
Magnus smiled and ran his hand down Alec’s chest, the gentle pressure of his fingertips making Alec shudder. “How do you want me, my love?”  
“I... I don’t know.” Alec swallowed drily. “I just...”  
“Want me?” Magnus finished for him, a smile on his face while he looked at him with heavy-lidded eyes.  
Alec could only nod.

Magnus sat up, and after placing a few kisses down Alec’s chest and abdomen, swung one leg across both of Alec’s to straddle Alec’s hips. Alec closed his eyes with a groan.

As he enjoyed both the giving and the taking, Magnus had never been limited to certain positions, but this was what he loved most. A snap of his fingers was all the preparation he needed, and he kept his eyes on Alec’s face as he lowered himself down until their bodies were pressed together.

Alec’s loud and unchecked moan vibrated through Magnus’ chest, and he smiled, already breathing harder. Like this, Alec had no control over himself, not over his body that was putty in Magnus’ hands, not over his face, and not over his voice and the sounds he made. And Magnus was still in awe every time he looked down at Alec’s face, knowing that it was him, Magnus Bane, who was the first and only person in this world to ever see him like that, completely unshielded and completely undone.

In his life Magnus had more than once complained to various male partners when he had to do all the work in this particular position, but with Alec he loved it, enjoyed every moment of it, loved every sound that he could draw from Alec’s lips with every move of his hips, adored that Alec was so lost in Magnus that he couldn’t move anymore. He let himself go, let himself fall, safe in the knowledge that Magnus’ arms would be there to catch him.

After Magnus gently separated their bodies, even the slightest of touches of his magic to clean Alec up made him shudder, a soft gasp escaping him that made Magnus smile. When he settled down at Alec’s side again, Alec immediately turned onto his side and pulled Magnus close, curling around him and holding on to him as if he was drowning and Magnus the only thing keeping him from going under.

Magnus snuggled into his embrace with a happy sigh. He loved being so completely enveloped by Alec’s warmth. He had no desire to move at all anymore, so he snapped his fingers to pull the blanket over them.

“I love you, “Alec muttered into Magnus’ hair.  
“I love you too,” Magnus replied softly.

They fell asleep listening to each other’s breathing, kept warm and safe in each other’s arms.


End file.
